Best Man Duties:15 Tasks the Best Man Needs on His List
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If you have been asked to take charge of the best man duties, congratulations! It is an honor and a truly huge deal to be trusted to ensure the couple’s big day succeeds.
Being the best man can be exciting and thrilling. But it comes with responsibilities, and you should prepare for the big day with as much fervor as the couple. You do not want to show up as the best man; you want to be the best man that SHOWS UP.
You were not chosen by lottery, it was intentional, and a lot is riding on you. You have to live up to this belief and trust they have placed in you, and a great place to start is reading this article.
So, good job!
Enough praise. What exactly does the best man do? What items are supposed to be on the best man duties checklist? And is it the best man or the best person?
Find out now.
Who is the best man or the best person?
The best man in a wedding is usually the groom’s closest male friend, family member, or anyone else who serves as the groom’s chief supporter. Also, this person practically doubles as an assistant during the wedding planning process and on the wedding day.
The term “best person” is a gender-neutral alternative that you can use instead of “best man” to include non-males who play this role.
Anybody can fill this role. But it is ultimately up to the groom or the couple to decide who they feel best fits this role.
Best man duties: 15 tasks the best man needs on his list
The best man will be very busy. If not, more engaged than the would-be couple. He has responsibilities before, during, and even after the wedding.
A. Pre-wedding duties
So what does a best man do before the wedding? Here are some of the roles of the best man as the wedding day approaches:
1. Help the groom pick out, rent or purchase wedding attire
One of the responsibilities of a best man should be to assist the groom in selecting and renting or purchasing his wedding outfit.
You want the groom to look their best. No one wants a shabbily or poorly dressed groom. You may need to accompany him to a tuxedo or suit rental shop to get his swag on.
Wedding suit or a tuxedo? Watch this video to learn how they differ and which is suitable for the occasion
2. Organize the bachelor party or weekend
The bachelor party is not your last time out with the groom, but it might be the last time out with him as a bachelor. You want to help commemorate this event, and you want to be the one to throw your buddy the best bachelor party ever.
It takes a lot of planning, logistics, and location scouting for your different adventures. In conjunction with the groomsmen, the best man is sometimes expected to foot this bill, so keep those receipts.
Related Reading: The Ultimate Wedding-Planning Checklist: Start to Finish
3. Help the groom write and practice his speech
Even if your buddy is a direct descendant of Shakespeare, the wedding would be their biggest day yet, and it can be an intensely nerve-racking ordeal.
As the best man, you must help the groom get in his groove, encourage him to practice, and perfect his lines so it is a stroll come the big day.
You can help him work the speech from the ground up, consistently pumping out anecdotes that will get people beaming with smiles and, in the same breath, thanking anyone who may have contributed with some marriage advice.
4. Attend wedding rehearsals and help coordinate the groomsmen
As the best man, you must attend the wedding rehearsal and help coordinate the groomsmen. This could involve making everyone coordinated and practicing the wedding processional and recessional order.
You only have one shot, no room for errors.
5. Ensure that the groomsmen have their attire and accessories for the wedding day
You must ensure that all the groomsmen have their attire and accessories for the wedding day. This may involve checking in with them a few days before the wedding to ensure they have everything they need.
B. Responsibilities on the wedding day
So the day is here. The following are some best man wedding duties:
6. Ensure the groom has his vows and other necessary wedding day items
The day is finally here, and the pressure is at its peak. With so many moving pieces, it is not unusual that some things would be out of place. This is where the best man steps in, operating like a fail-safe to ensure everything goes exactly as planned.
They ensure the vows are secured, available at a moment’s notice, the ring, and whatever else is necessary throughout the day.
Related Reading: 21 Helpful Pointers for Couples Preparing for Marriage
7. Keep the wedding rings safe
The best man is typically responsible for keeping the wedding rings safe until when needed during the ceremony. Make sure that they are secure and easily accessible when the time comes.
8. Ensure the groom eats something and stays hydrated on the wedding day
It’s important that the groom eats something and stays hydrated on the wedding day, especially if the ceremony and reception take place over a long period. As the wedding best man, you should ensure he takes care of himself throughout the day.
9. Assist with transporting the groom and groomsmen to the ceremony and reception venues
Transportation is an important aspect of the wedding day, and you may be responsible for arranging it. This may involve renting a limousine(s) to transport the groom, the groomsmen, and the family.
10. Help welcome the guests
If you are the best man, chances are many of the guests know you. Who better to welcome them than a friendly, familiar face? It is crucial that amidst everything else going on, you welcome guests as they arrive.
Don’t forget to smile.
Related Reading: 9 Ways to Delight Your Wedding Guests
11. Help ensure that the wedding gifts and cards are kept safe during the reception
One best man job is to ensure the wedding gifts and cards are kept safe during the reception.
You do not need to carry them around; you don’t even need to saddle yourself directly with the responsibility. You can delegate people to ensure the safety of the gift items and safe transport to the couple’s residence after the event.
12. Coordinate with the groom’s family to ensure they know any plans or tasks they must help with
You are the best man, but you can not do everything. So you will need to put some people to work, and a great choice is the groom’s family. You can delegate tasks and properly involve them in the planning so you have all the help you can get.
C. Post-ceremony responsibilities
Some of the best man responsibilities after the wedding include:
13. Return the groom’s tuxedo or suit
The last thing you want the groom to worry about after their big day is where to return the outfit (if rented). Even worse is if they are hit with a fine for a late return. Someone must return the tux or the suit, and that person is you.
14. Help with the cleanup
One of the responsibilities of a best man involves helping with or coordinating the cleanup. This could involve removing decorations and returning rentals.
15. Handle vendors
Some people still have to be paid after the event. The band, the DJ, the caterers, and everybody with an outstanding bill expect payment. You do not want to bother the couple yet, so you must sort these bills pending when you can bring them up with the groom and their partner.
Best man vs. groomsmen responsibilities
We have hashed out what the best man does exhaustively, but what about the groomsmen? Are they just there for free food and free wine? Let’s see.
One thing you can not put a price on is the atmosphere the groomsmen bring. Alongside the best man, being there for the groom is guaranteed to put a smile on his face.
A smile that is extra handy if the groom is one that needs all the confidence he can get to function optimally in a social gathering.
Words of wisdom
Among the groomsmen, more than a couple would have attended several weddings. They would have witnessed firsthand what works and what absolutely needs to go. They would contribute this knowledge to the planning of the event.
Help run errands
If the groomsmen are the choir, the best man is the choirmaster. The best man and groomsmen work in tandem, with each person handling different posts.
Instead of having one person doing all the running around, he can have someone pick up clothes, another check-in with the decorators, and someone else help with the food and wine tasting.
More questions on best man duties
Check out these further questions on best man duties.
How many best men are at the wedding party?
Nowadays, the number of best men in a wedding party can vary depending on the couple’s preferences and cultural traditions.
In the past, having a single best man at a wedding party was customary, but in modern times, there are no strict rules.
How do you ask someone to be the best man?
Asking someone to be your best man is an integral part of the wedding process.
After solving the problem of choosing the best man, you must ask the selected person.
There are several ways to ask someone to be your best man. Since you know the person well, you should be able to decide on the perfect way to ask the person that will make it impossible to say no.
Below are some of the ways to ask:
- Ask with a gift
There is an abundance of “proposal” gifts available that you can use to ask someone to be your best man. These items include tie clips, personalized t-shirts, golf balls, whiskey glasses, or even a pack of beer. Whatever you choose should come with asking the question, “Will you be my best man?”
- Just ask
Like Nike, just do it.
You don’t necessarily need a detailed plan, a special gift, or an elaborate gesture to ask someone to be your best man. In fact, it’s perfectly acceptable to ask them simply.
Most of the time, they would not care how you ask them to participate in your wedding. What matters most is that you ask them, and they get to support you on your special day.
Does the best man pay for anything?
Yes, the best man might have to pay for things before, during, and after the wedding. Some of the expenses include the following:
– Bachelor party
The best man is typically in charge of organizing the bachelor party for the groom. Most times, the groom does not pay for his bachelor party. So you will be expected to cover some or all of the expenses associated with the event.
– Wedding attire
The best man is usually responsible for paying for his wedding attire, including any rentals or purchases.
– Gift for the couple
As the best man at the wedding, you must give the couple a wedding gift. You can do this alone or as a group gift from the groomsmen is nice.
Nobody said it was going to be easy work. In a way, these are only the basics; the more significant the wedding, the more time, money, and effort you need to invest.
But it is all worth it. The days would fly, and it would all come out great, no small thanks to you and your ever-ready choir of groomsmen.
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