The biblical perspective of forgiveness in marriage correlates with forgiveness in all relations. The incorporation of forgiveness allows married couples to have faith in marriage restoration.
The Christian principles advocate for forgiveness because of its negative effects stated in Galatians 5:19 (acts of sinful nature). Galatians 5:22 lists the fruits of the Holy Spirit which are the positive results of forgiveness. They include love, peace patience, faithfulness, humility, kindness, joy, gentleness, and self-control.
The bible states that forgiveness is the power of the Holy Spirit as it draws love. In marriage, prayer is a powerful tool of intercession between Christ our father (God). The example of how to pray in our Lord prayer in Mathew 6:1 states “….Forgive us for our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us”
A letter of Paul to the Ephesians in Chapter 4:31-32”…Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger brawling lander and every form of malice. 32: be kind and compassionate to another, forgiving one another just like Christ in Heaven forgave you. We are compelled to love one another. Christ took the form of man and went through all humiliation and further crucifixion, if He could still forgive us for our sins, then who are we to hold grudges against our spouses?
Some of the hurt feelings are so deeply rooted in our hearts that you feel forgiveness is not an option. There is hope when you trust in God. In Mathew 19:26 “with man this is impossible but with God, it is possible” Jesus assures the disciples to have an open mind for God to send us the Holy Spirit to soften our heart to look at impossibilities as possibilities.
However deep the hurt feeling due to action from your spouse, you have no authority to harden your heart, forgive him to assure love and the gifts of the Holy Spirit to work on the weaknesses of your spouse. How many times should you forgive your partner?
Mathew 18:22, Jesus answers the disciples on the number of times you should forgive someone who offends you ….” I tell you not seven times but seventy-seven times. Obviously, you will never keep count of the number of times you should forgive your spouse, it should be unlimited.
Mathew 6:14, after Jesus taught his disciples on how to pray – the Lord’s Prayer. He saw the doubt in the disciples on forgiveness and told them. ”if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive them then your Heavenly Father will also not forgive you.
Due to our human imperfections as a husband or wife, do not be quick to remove a speck in your spouse’s eye while you leave a log in your own eye. Our natural imperfections always hurt one another; to live in harmony then we have to forgive to allow God to also forgive us and meet our needs as we ask in prayer.
Romans5:8 “…But still, God demonstrates his own love for us, while we were still sinners he died for us.” It gives a clear account on the purpose of Jesus to come and save the sinners. How many times do we sin against God? Yet, He looks aside and still gives us an opportunity to repent and embrace the title “God’s children.” Why not demonstrate the same love to your spouse through forgiveness to get rid of the hurt feelings. We are no better than Christ who humbled Himself and wore the shoes of Humanity with all the glory and died for us to be saved. It did not rip Him of power and glory. That is the same principle spouses should practice. Forgiveness is love.
Ephesians 5:25: “husbands love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave up himself for her.
I john 1:19 “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. Just like Christ teaches us, you have to accept the responsibility for your behavior; a clear indication you acknowledge the right and wrong doing for God to exercise the right of forgiveness.
Similarly, a spouse who offends the partner must lower her/her pride to confess their sins for the spouse to forgive. When there is the confession of wrongdoing it opens a discussion to clear any doubts, thoughts, and misunderstanding to get a solution to the problem then forgiveness sets in.