Pillow Talk Could Save Your Marriage and Boost Your Health

In those few minutes between the time you lay in bed and you fall asleep, something important could be taking place that could affect your marriage and your health. What is it? Something as simple as a little pillow talk.

What is pillow talk?

Pillow talk is the conversation that happens between couples in bed before sleep, perhaps while cuddling, and even before or after sexual intimacy. This is when the couple can be really honest with each other, share their feelings, and bond in a very strong way. Especially when done consistently over time, pillow talk for couples is very effective in creating a positive environment for your relationship and health to thrive.

In fact, pillow talk has been proven in a study among Oregon couples to help their relationships and health; the findings are being presented at the 2017 Society for Personality and Social Psychology Annual Convention.

The great thing about engaging in nightly pillow talk, according to the study, is that these don’t have to be hour-long conversations before bed.

What does pillow talk mean? Just a few tidbits of information are all that is needed to enjoy the benefits of pillow talk for couples, but the key is this—it must be positive news. We bring you some exciting pillow talk ideas to get you started. 

Some examples of pillow talk for couples are :

• Something good that happened to you today,
• Something funny the kids did recently,
• Something nice someone did for you,
• A win at work,
• Something that reminded you of your spouse,
• Something that made you happy,
• A funny YouTube video, and so on.

Some common pillow talk questions for couples

• How would you describe me to someone who doesn’t know me?
• What dress do you think I look best in?
• Is there something I can do help you reach your goals faster?
• What is one thing or habit I could change about myself that you’d really appreciate?
• What’s your memory of the best sex we have had?
• What’s the highlight of the day?
• Which was the best day of your life?

Obviously, these aren’t huge, life-changing conversations by themselves. But when shared before bed as nightly pillow talk, they can change your perspective little by little, having a huge impact over time. Here are the many benefits of pillow talk for couples :

End the day on a positive note

Aren’t our days hard enough? We are faced with a lot of negativity from other people, things happening in the world, things posted on social media, work conflicts, traffic… the list goes on. It can be so easy to carry that over from day to day. But, when you end the day by having a positive interaction with your spouse or significant other, it helps put those things in perspective.

Pillow talk for couples is the perfect opportunity to be positive, and then you’ll be looking forward to it! Instead of reviewing your day and seeing the negative, you are both focusing on the good in life and then ending the day on a positive note with bed talk. Keep that habit up and you’ll see a trend for a positive life.

Appreciate each other

You and your spouse have so many demands on your time; if you aren’t able to connect at the end of the day with a little pillow talk, then you may feel an over-arching disconnect in the marriage.

One big benefit of pillow talk is the connection you will feel. It may only be a few minutes of conversation, but it can mean a world of difference in your marriage. With pillow talk for couples practiced every day, you both get a chance to share your feelings, show the other person you care, feel heard, and then feel grateful for a loving spouse.

Pillow talk conversations help you air your concerns, fears, joys, and deep-seated feelings.

Good night’s sleep

So many of us have trouble sleeping. Why? Our brains don’t seem to be able to “shut off” completely. When you lay down at night, if your mind won’t stop whirling, then one way to help calm it is pillow talk. Get out your thoughts and feelings that are whirling around with someone you love and trust—your spouse or significant other. You both have a great opportunity to help each other unwind.

Pillow talk for couples helps in getting things out in the open, which will help your mind rest, which will then help your body to rest and sleep better.

Reduce anxiety, other illnesses

The effects of pillow talk for couples are immense. Just think—if you could get better sleep, end the day on a positive note, and feel more connected with the one you love—how would you feel? Emotionally you’d feel amazing, and physically you’d also feel amazing. That could possibly mean less anxiety, fewer illnesses; you’d have overall better mental and physical health. Who wouldn’t want that?

In fact, pillow talk after sex can also help you enjoy a more fulfilling and intimate life along with feeling more secure.

The more fulfilling intimate relationship

Distractions are a part of our modern lives—TV, social media, smartphones, and all kinds of gadgets. They plague our days, but when it comes to night time with our spouse, it’s time to turn them off. The fewer distractions in the bedroom, the better.

This allows for more pillow talk, which leads to a stronger connection and loving relationship. What does that lead to? Well, try it and find out. The physical side of your relationship—specifically your intimate relationship—will grow as you continue to engage in more pillow talk. You’ll feel more heard in everyday life with your spouse, which will then lead to feeling more trusting and fulfilled in what goes on behind closed doors. 

What is pillow talk in relationships? A great tool for cementing your bond with your spouse. During pillow talk for couples, spouses can disclose their feelings, bust stress and take their intimacy to a whole new level. It’s infinitely loaded with benefits. About time you give it a try for a healthy relationship.

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The Marriage.com Editorial Team is a group of experienced relationship writers, experts, and mental health professionals. We provide practical and research-backed advice on relationships. Our content is thoroughly reviewed by experts... Read more to ensure that we offer high-quality and reliable relationship advice. Read less