Dating is a pretty scary thing. Dating after separation is another!
You have probably asked yourself the question ‘How long to wait to date after separation?’ You might have even searched for answers on the internet. And just in case you’re ready, we’ve got your back!
In this article, we’re sharing with you five trusty tips to help you decide when to get back into it!
1. Don’t rush yourself into dating
Not all separations are the same. Just like not all marriages are the same.
When beginning to date again, you might be worrying if there is a specific answer to your question ‘How long to wait to date after separation?’ But the answer to this question is not so cut and dry – it will depend on you entirely.
Moving on is a very tedious process, and not everyone’s the same when it comes to ‘healing time.’ You may find testimonials on the internet that said that they started dating soon as they started with the divorce, yet some would say they waited years after the divorce was finalized.
The definitive answer to the question is dependent on you. What does your gut say?
It’s probably important to avoid rushing, but if you are starting to question this and you have somebody in mind, it won’t hurt to take things slowly would it? You don’t have to go all in immediately.
On the other hand, It could take you a long time before you are ready. There are no hard and fast rules that guide you on your decisions for when you should start dating again after a separation.
Take your time and ease into it. After all, you have the rest of your life to explore being back to yourself again.
2. Consider using dating apps
Welcome to the modern age of dating.
If you are out of options on who to start dating, might we suggest using dating apps?
Dating apps are a good way to survey your area for potential dates! Using one could be extremely good for someone who is just starting to date again.
This is because dating apps offer the possibility of speaking to a potential date before even actually dating! This somehow removes the awkward stages of talking during a first date.
You can use this tool if you’re still hung up on answering your question ‘How long to wait to date after separation?’ Maybe after five right swipes, you realize that ‘Hey, I think I’m ready to give this a shot!’
It’s also a great way to find more like-minded people who are in the same situation as you and who need to take things slow too. It doesn’t have to be fast paced – the possibilities are just endless!
3. Go on a lot of different kinds of dates
A first date could be scary, but remind yourself that all dates could be fun!
There are so many ways to do a first date that doesn’t involve any boozy drinks. From coffee shop dates to ice cream parlor dates, to even book buying dates.
There’s no need to assume that a date should be late at night and involving drinks because not a lot of people are comfortable with that either.
As you go through your days attempting to answer ‘how long to wait to date after separation,’ maybe you can make a list of all the nice first date ideas that you’d like to go to.
Maybe for a first date, you can ask them if attending a workshop could sit well with them. Not only will you get to know your date sober, but you’ll also probably like this workshop and even turn it into your money-making hobby.
4. Hope for the best, expect the worst
If this isn’t a good way to approach dating after separation, then we don’t know how else to do it.
We all have a friend who has gone through a really, extremely bad first date. We understand that this might scare you off from dating.
As we said, dates should be fun. However, not everyone you’ll meet will jive well with your personality or worse; they will be too crude for you. (Let’s hope not)
In addition to your personal expectations, remember to be safe always. In the case that your date becomes abusive even at the first date, have emergency numbers on the ready.
5. Don’t forget to be yourself
We all know the challenge of just being oneself. It’s hard. It’s difficult.
Just take a look at the amount of face-altering filters and what-not available right now on the internet. We’d like to ask though, wouldn’t you want to be liked just for simply being who you are?
If you let yourself grow in the current interests and values that you have, you are letting yourself grow into the person you truly ought to be.
If you let these interests and values fill your life, you are also defining your life in such a way that is truly yours. And who knows, maybe you won’t have to go through downloading different dating apps because, within the realm of your interests, someone could also be waiting to share themselves to someone whose interests match theirs.
When you are yourself, you can express yourself more. You can show confidence. And trust us, confidence is sexy.
Want to have a happier, healthier marriage?
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.