15+ Reasons When a Man Is Avoiding Eye Contact

Under normal circumstances, a guy should be able to hold eye contact when communicating with a girl. In addition to making him appear confident, this ensures that a deep connection exists between both people. 

However, when a man is avoiding eye contact, it can be a red flag you might want to look out for in your relationship. 

To determine what may be the challenge and how to fix it, you should know why he is avoiding eye contact all of a sudden. You should also be aware of what to do when your man avoids eye contact with you. Keep reading to find out more. 

What does it mean when a guy avoids eye contact?

Lack of eye contact can be an indication of many things. For one, when a person constantly avoids looking you in the eye, it could suggest that they don’t want to engage with you (or whatever is in front of them) or that they would rather be somewhere else.  

When a man can’t look a woman in the eye, it could mean many things, including a sense of guilt, an expression of frustration, an expression of his love and admiration for her, or it could just be that he is just bored to death and would do anything to get away from her. 

When a guy avoids eye contact, he does everything to look in every other direction except into the girl’s eyes. This could be in a conversation, when hanging out, or just when they interact for the tiniest moments. 

Although there are many reasons why a man is avoiding eye contact in psychology, one thing remains sure. Don’t celebrate or bemoan his inability to look you straight in the eye just yet. Not until you have determined exactly what is going on in his mind!

Is avoiding eye contact a sign of attraction?

When a man is avoiding eye contact, is it a sign of attraction? It can be.

There is a relationship between eye contact and attraction. Research has found that making eye contact plays a crucial role in how we see and connect with others. Forbes states that even when looking at pictures or drawings of eyes, this simple act creates a powerful, subconscious sense of connection.

That said, different people approach the use of eye contact in different ways. 

Some would rather feel nervous and avoid eye contact when they feel attracted to someone. The others intensify their eye contact when they feel attracted to someone. 

Attraction could be one of the reasons someone avoids eye contact. When a person feels strongly for another, they may be overwhelmed with their emotions and decide that their best course of action is to avoid looking the other person in the eye. 

If this is the case with your man, you may want to consider his lack of eye contact together with other non-verbal cues like his overall facial expressions and even his tone of voice. 

15+ reasons why a man is avoiding eye contact

When someone avoids making eye contact, it can be puzzling and leave us wondering about the underlying reasons. Let us explore the possible explanations behind this. 

These are 11 of the strongest reasons why he is avoiding eye contact with you. 

1. He’s angry at something 

Are you wondering, “Why is he avoiding eye contact all of a sudden and seems visibly upset over something? It’s self-explanatory. 

When a guy is angry at something, he may end up avoiding eye contact with you. This may be his way of trying to protect himself and prevent you from seeing the anger flashing in his eyes. 

Also, avoiding eye contact with you when he is angry could also be because he is trying to protect you from feeling the same thing he feels at the moment. There are many reasons why he may be avoiding eye contact. 

Psychologist Mert Şeker says that this situation is an example of evolutionary psychology. If a man isn’t feeling vulnerable or safe around you, he’ll just observe instead of making any eye contact with you.

2. He’s angry with you

Anger is the second reason why a man is avoiding eye contact as per psychology. When a guy is angry with you, he may show his ill emotions by keeping away from establishing eye contact.   

To be sure about this, think about the things that have happened between you in the recent past. Did you get into an argument before now? Did you say something to someone about him? These could be the triggers for his anger.  

3. He likes you 

Do guys avoid eye contact if they like you? Yes, it is possible.

Avoiding eye contact is a common sign of attraction in some cases, as we have already discussed early on. When a guy avoids establishing eye contact, it could be because he likes you or has a crush on you. 

He may think that by avoiding eye contact in attraction, he can mask his feelings and make sure that you don’t suspect that he feels attracted to you. 

Psychologist Mert Şeker says that when a man likes a woman, he is shy, like a little kid, but also worried about rejection. As a result, not making eye contact will make him feel safer.

Usually, a shy guy will go this route when he has feelings for you because he may not be able to walk up to you and ask you out immediately. 

4. He feels intimidated by you 

If you feel ‘he makes eye contact with everyone but me,’ it’s possible that he finds you intimidating. 

So, if you have been asking what does it mean when someone avoids eye contact when talking to you, consider the possibility of the other person being intimidated by you. 

When a guy thinks of you as too beautiful, too successful, or just out of his league, he may have strong feelings for you but will never come clean because he believes that you wouldn’t ever be interested in him.  

Instead of risking it, he can choose to stay far from you and just observe from the sidelines. Under these conditions, you may catch him stealing glances at you, but he would be quick to avert his gaze every time he knows that you are looking at him. 

5. He is naturally shy 

Shy people tend to avoid eye contact when engaging or conversing with others. If a man is avoiding eye contact with you because he is shy, the first thing you’d notice is that he does the same thing in interactions with other people.  

In addition, if a man is avoiding eye contact, you can confirm if he is just the shy type by evaluating his overall non-verbal cues. Does he shrink into himself when people approach him? Does he slouch when sitting? Does he make it a point of duty to keep a distance from people? 

6. He doesn’t want to interact with you 

If he can’t look you in the eye anymore, it could be a sign that he would rather be doing something else than engaging with you at the moment. 

To be sure, evaluate other body signs like the direction his feet are pointed in, how tense his posture is, and whether or not he is wearing a genuine smile. 

7. He is hiding something 

It is an age-long knowledge that someone who is hiding something or telling you a lie will tend to avoid eye contact when conversing with you. In addition to avoiding the contact, he’ll be fidgety and his eyes may even carry a demented look. 

If he is suddenly sweaty on the palms and under his armpits, you may want to double-check. 

8. He just finds it difficult 

Regardless of how ridiculous this may sound, some people have issues with making and holding eye contact with others. 

This could be because of underlying health conditions (like the case of autistic people who avoid eye contact because it causes anxiety), or it could be traceable to environmental factors like the conditions under which he grew up. 

9. It may be his way of telling you that he is already taken 

One of the reasons why a man is avoiding eye contact could be because he already has a partner. Some guys believe that deep eye gazing is sacred and is one aspect of intimacy they should reserve for their partners only.  

As usual, you want to consider other interdependent factors, like if the said partner is somewhere close by. Then again, a quick look at his ring finger should reveal if he is married (at least). 

10. He probably doesn’t know 

Another reason why a man is avoiding eye contact could be because he doesn’t even know that you would want to establish eye contact with him. If he comes from a place where holding eye contact is considered disrespectful, it could be a knee-jerk reaction for him to avoid eye contact. 

Under these circumstances, you may find out that he doesn’t just do it to you alone.

The easiest way to get over this awkward stage would be to drop subtle hints to let him know that you are looking at him or are interested in him. Then give him the time and space he needs to adjust. 

11. Social conditioning or upbringing

Upbringing and social conditioning can play a significant role in shaping behavior. A guy may have been raised with certain beliefs or norms that discourage direct eye contact with girls. 

You can tell the difference if he talks that way to every girl that is outside his family or close circle.

12. Anxiety or social anxiety

Individuals with anxiety disorders or social anxiety may find it challenging to make eye contact. The fear of judgment or negative evaluation can cause discomfort, leading them to avoid direct eye contact.

13. Cultural differences

If you are wondering, “Why does a man avoid eye contact,” you should take the cultural context into consideration before coming to a conclusion. 

Cultural norms and values can influence the perception of eye contact. In some cultures, prolonged eye contact may be considered disrespectful or overly intimate. Therefore, a person might avoid eye contact due to cultural conditioning.

14. Lack of confidence

Low self-esteem or lack of confidence can contribute to why a man is avoiding eye contact. Individuals who don’t feel secure about themselves may fear that others will see their vulnerabilities through their eyes, leading them to avert their gaze.

15. Past trauma or negative experiences

Previous negative experiences, such as bullying or emotional trauma, can make someone hesitant to establish eye contact. It may trigger feelings of vulnerability or fear, causing them to instinctively avoid eye contact as a protective measure.

16. Medical or vision issues

Certain medical conditions or vision problems could be a factor in avoiding eye contact. Struggling with eye-related discomfort, sensitivity to light, or difficulty focusing may make it physically uncomfortable for someone to maintain eye contact.

Understanding that various factors, including psychological, cultural, and personal reasons, can contribute to avoiding eye contact allows for a more nuanced interpretation of this behavior.

Factors to consider when a man avoids eye contact

It is unwise to draw instant conclusions when a man can’t look a woman in the eye. This is because you may be quick to judge him as hiding something or too fast to decide that he can’t do so because he loves her and is flustered just by being in her presence. 

The challenge is that these aren’t always the case. 

When a man constantly avoids eye contact, the first thing to do is ask yourself this question, “why does he avoid eye contact?” A critical look at the situation at hand can reveal what’s going on in his mind regarding you.

Regardless, here are a couple of things to consider when a man avoids eye contact with a woman or man. 

1. Comparing with normal behavior 

It may not make a lot of sense to draw summaries about what is going on with him if you don’t start by comparing this against his normal behavior. Is it just you, or does he avoid eye contact with other people? 

If you study his normal behavior and see that he makes eye contact with other people, then you may want to pay closer attention to other situations so that you can know exactly what’s going through his mind. 

Psychologist Mert Şeker says that eye contact can provide information about the psychological disorders that people may have from early childhood. It is another point to be noted here.

Individuals with social phobia or introverted personalities can also avoid making eye contact.

2. Considering the conversation going on

Some guys get shy and flustered when some subjects are raised, especially subjects that have to do with love, romance, and relationships. While trying to figure out why a guy avoids eye contact, it is best that you start by considering the conversation going on. 

Was he making eye contact and suddenly stopped when a specific conversation came up? If yes, it could be that the conversation served as the trigger that caused him to shift his focus from you. 

3. Observing the presence of others 

If he avoids eye contact while talking or listening to you, also make a mental note of the people around you. 

Some guys either feel emboldened when others are around (and would look you straight in the eye during a conversation). Some others, on the other hand, may feel shy and spooked because of the people around.  

4. Noticing accompanying non-verbal cues

Other non-verbal cues that accompany his lack of eye contact will help you know exactly what’s going on in his mind. Is he blushing at the same time? Does he have a small, soft smile on his face as he tries to evade eye contact? 

If these body language clusters show up together, it could be a sign that he likes you or that you may have made him feel flustered. 

To learn more about non-verbal communication, watch the video by former FBI agent and public speaker, Joe Nevarro:

FAQs

Eye contact is a powerful form of nonverbal communication, and its absence can leave us feeling confused or uncertain about others’ intentions. In this section, we address common questions related to avoiding eye contact and its potential meanings.

• Is it normal for men to avoid eye contact?

No, it is not. But avoiding eye contact can stem from various reasons, such as shyness, lack of confidence, or cultural norms. He may feel nervous or unsure around you, which makes maintaining eye contact challenging. It’s important to consider other cues and verbal communication to better understand his intentions.

• Can eye contact be used to tell if a man is lying?

While eye contact can sometimes be associated with honesty and openness, it is not a definitive indicator of someone hiding something. People may avoid eye contact for various reasons, including shyness, discomfort, or cultural differences. 

It’s important to consider other behavioral cues and engage in open communication to better understand someone’s intentions.

• What should I do if someone I’m interested in avoids eye contact?

If someone constantly avoids eye contact and appears disinterested, it may be a sign that they are not fully engaged in the conversation or the situation. Consider giving them space or asking open-ended questions to encourage their participation. If the disinterest persists, it may be worth discussing your observations with them.

• How can I improve my eye contact skills?

Improving eye contact skills starts with awareness. Practice making direct eye contact with people you interact with daily, such as friends and family. Maintain eye contact for a few seconds before looking away. 

Gradually increase the duration of maintaining eye contact. Practice in front of a mirror to monitor your progress. Additionally, try engaging in conversations and actively listening while maintaining eye contact. Over time, these exercises will help to improve your eye contact skills and make you appear more confident and attentive.

• What does it mean if a man avoids eye contact with a woman he likes?

If a man avoids eye contact with a woman he likes, it could indicate nervousness or shyness. Eye contact is often viewed as an intimate and personal gesture, so avoiding it may suggest the individual is feeling self-conscious or unsure about how to act around the woman. 

Additionally, it could be a sign of attraction as some people tend to look away when they feel overwhelmed by someone’s presence. However, it’s important not to jump to conclusions. It’s advisable to consider other contextual factors and observe the person’s overall behavior for a more accurate understanding.

Interpreting his behavior correctly

Interpreting eye contact requires considering various factors like shyness, cultural differences, and personal insecurities. It’s important to look at the bigger picture and consider other nonverbal cues to understand his intentions accurately. By promoting open and empathetic communication, we can foster deeper connections and better understand one another.