What Is Sexual Attraction?

Have you ever met someone who seems to have an oozing sex appeal, and you feel that insatiable connection with them but know that it’s not romantic? Without knowing it, you might already be sexually attracted to this person.

What is sexual attraction, and what does it mean to be sexually attracted to someone? What determines sexual attraction is different for everyone. What you find sexually attractive, another person might not.

It’s where you can imagine yourself with this person and you know that it’s not just about conversations while having coffee? 

We all know that we’re feeling sexual attraction here but do you sometimes wonder why this happens, or do you feel guilty when you feel this way for another person even if you are already in a relationship? Don’t worry. It’s perfectly normal, and all of us will feel it whether we admit it or not. Let’s educate ourselves on what causes attraction between man and woman and the signs of sexual attraction.

Also Try: Is My Boyfriend Sexually Attracted to Me Quiz

What is a sexual attraction?

Sexual attraction definition is when a person gets interested or attracted to someone who meets their sexual choices.

It’s when our body and mind are drawn to someone who would be a good mate for us, as science describes it. While we may think that it’s all about physical appearances such as beauty or vital statistics – sexual attraction can happen for many reasons.

A person’s actions, the way they talk, and the way they smell can play a huge factor.

What is sexual attractiveness to you?

You may experience being sexually attracted to someone who is just so physically appealing, and you can also get attracted to someone who talks sexy. It can happen differently each time, but expect it to happen more than once.

What makes you sexually attracted to someone may not be the same as someone else. It’s how our minds and body react to a specific person. What does sexual attraction feel like, and how do you know if you have a strong sexual attraction to someone?

What causes sexual attraction?

What is sexual attraction to us humans? What causes sexual attraction? By now, you are familiar with what does being sexually attracted means. It’s the attraction that makes us desire another person, and that intense desire includes sexual or physical contact. 

It’s pretty simple, but we may have asked ourselves, “What makes us drawn or attracted to someone?”

There can be many factors that affect attraction. Here’s why.

Also Try: Am I In Love or Lust?

1. Psychological factors

You look at someone, and you feel the sexual tension and attraction, but did you know that there are psychological factors that play roles in this?

How’s your attachment style? A person who shows or reflects your expectations regarding trust, care, and intimacy becomes attractive sexually.

Even your mood could determine how you perceive someone as sexually attractive. There is also the psychological factor of challenging yourself to win someone over. 

2. Biological factors

When you meet someone, it could happen in a snap – you’re sexually attracted to them. 

“What is sexual attraction, and why am I drawn to this person?”

Of course, you no longer have the time to discern why, but here are the biological factors that could have played a part in your attraction.

Smell plays a big part in sexual attraction. Like how animals choose their mate, we are also drawn to certain smells. To add to that, pheromones, our natural scent, contribute to that sexual desire. 

Did you know that being fertile makes you smell attractive and give you a different glow? That’s another biological factor that influences our sexual attraction. Also, hormones affect us differently as well.

Many other factors affect our sexual attraction. It could be our location, familiar relationships, and so much more. We all have different preferences and combined with these factors, it will determine our sexual attraction in a relationship. 

What are the examples of sexual attraction?

What does sexual attraction feel like if it’s your first time encountering it?

Some people can be sexually attractive with no effort at all. You see a person, and you notice that undeniable sex appeal, and you can’t help but feel drawn to them.

• You want to get physically intimate with this person. When you look into each other’s eyes, the physical connection is too strong. 

• You meet someone, and you introduce yourself, and when you shake this person’s hands, you feel that electricity flowing in your body. It’s one of the earliest signs to recognize sexual attraction. 

• You meet someone, and you feel this intense desire of passion, affection, attraction, and the intense feeling you want to be close.

The reality is, it’s hard to control the urge to be close and physically intimate to someone you like. If you become friends and close to each other, expect that flirting would be present.  

What is sexual attraction like for someone who has felt it for the first time?  It’s addicting.  

That intense feeling that you want to be close to someone will make you act on it. You can be friends, flirt, show your attention, and more.  

There’s nothing wrong with feeling sexual attraction to someone. Having a strong sexual connection with someone can also be a good foundation for a healthy relationship, not unless you’re already committed with someone else. 

What does sexual attraction feel like?

You might ask yourself what does sexual attraction feel like?

Some people would describe it as being drawn to someone where you just want to be closer to this person and be sexually intimate.

When you are together, you feel the sexual tension between you. Being close to this person makes you feel alive inside, and a simple touch or a hug gives you that warm and sexy feeling inside of you.

What causes sexual attraction? We’re feeling this because it’s human nature. Like animals, we release pheromones, which can help us find a mate. It may not be evident today, but it’s still there.

There can be many reasons why we get sexually attracted to someone. Sometimes, even without effort, even without us knowing – we are already attracting someone. This is how it works. You can just feel a strong sexual attraction to a certain person, but how do you know if it’s sexual or romantic?

What are the different types of attraction?

What does sexual attraction feel like for asexual people? 

As we all know, asexual people do not experience any form of sexual attraction to anyone regardless of their gender. 

However, they can feel attraction differently, such as romantic, intellectual, or emotional. 

Attraction is a broad word, and we also need to be familiar with the other types of attraction.

• Aesthetic attraction: It is the attraction that focuses on a person’s physical appearance, and it doesn’t mean that they are attracted sexually.
• Emotional attraction: This attraction is deep and focuses on the connection, the feeling of attachment, trust, and even vulnerability with someone.
• Sensual attraction: This is a non-sexual form of intimacy. It’s sensual because you want to be touched, caressed, and hugged. It’s where you can show pure intimacy without going sexual. 
• Intellectual attraction: When a person is drawn to someone’s opinion, thoughts, or the deep conversation that they offer, then it’s intellectual attraction. They are mesmerized by the person’s intellect. As they say, intelligence is also sexy.

Getting turned on vs. sexual attraction

Now that you know what is sexual attraction, it’s time to differentiate sexual desire vs. sexual attraction.

Getting turned on or sexual desire differs from sexual attraction.

When sexually turned on, you’re getting aroused, and it follows physical reactions and changes.

What about sexual attraction? When we’re talking about sexual attraction, you are fond of someone you think is sexually appealing.

It may influence you to flirt, but you can also choose not to react to it in certain circumstances, especially when you’re in a committed relationship. 

Romantic vs. sexual attraction

Romantic vs. sexual attraction can be quite challenging to differentiate for some.

Sometimes, we are drawn to a person because of sexual attraction, but later on, we see that we aren’t compatible with each other and what we are feeling was just strong sexual tension.

However, we can also be attracted to someone romantically, and we can even fall in love with this person, but we may have little sexual attraction. 

There can also be instances where sexual attraction leads to romantic feelings because the more we become intimate with someone, the more we get closer to falling in love. So, consider yourself lucky to be romantically and sexually attracted to the same person.

Romantic vs. sexual attraction may still be hard to differentiate for some, so here are some ways to understand them better. 

Here are different signs to look for to better know if you’re sexually or romantically attracted to someone.

You’re sexually attracted to someone if –

1. You find yourself deeply lost with this person. You’re drawn to this person and just when your eyes meet, you know you want to be closer to them.
2. You can’t help but be flirtatious because it’s the science of sexual attraction. Our mind and body will also show that it has found a good mate. Even with how you talk, act, and even touch. It’s inevitable not to flirt.
3. You become a little bit self-conscious with how you act and talk with this person because you might be aware of how naughty your thoughts are getting, and well, you can’t wait to make a move or get a hint.
4. The more you’re with this person, the more you want them more. The slow burn is not just exciting; it’s also addicting. It may feel that it’s so hard to contain yourself.

You’re romantically attracted to someone if –

1. You find yourself having many similarities with this person. This gives both of you more reasons to talk and be closer. It’s like time flies when you’re with them.
2. You can see yourself being with this person for a long time. You might even imagine yourself having a family and getting married.
3. You’re romantically compatible if you want to grow better with this person. You can see yourself being a better person while allowing the other person to grow as an individual.
4. You can cuddle and be with each other for hours and talk about everything without thinking about anything sexual.

Now that you’re familiar with sexual attraction vs. romantic attraction, what if you found out you are sexually attracted to someone but already committed to someone else?

Feeling sexual attraction when you’re in a relationship

As we now understand how sexual attraction works and how it can affect us, surely some of you might already be in a situation where you feel a strong sexual attraction towards another person while you’re on a relationship.

Sadly, for some, this is the main cause of cheating. We have to understand that this is inevitable.

We will experience a time when we would be attracted to someone else even if we are in a relationship, but we can overcome this with self-control.

Remember that you are romantically attracted to the person you’re with right now.

If you feel confused, remember that what you’re feeling right now with the other one may be a temporary sexual attraction. 

Remember that you are committed, and if you can avoid situations where you will be close to the person you’re attracted to, that’s better.

10 signs you’re sexually attracted to someone

If you want to know how to recognize sexual attraction, here are ten ways.

1. Lingering eye contact

You’re joking around and having fun when you notice how deep you’re looking into each other’s eyes.

Those stares are pulling you closer. It’s intense and somewhat sexy.

You can’t quite explain it, but your heart is beating faster. It’s more than just a crush, and you know it.

2. Electrifying touch

When you’re friends, you can’t avoid touches. 

If you touch each other, may it be a simple handshake, a tap on the back, or a goodbye hug, you feel different. 

Some people say it’s electrifying. After all, your body reacts to that sexual connection that you have. 

3. Flirting

Flirting is unavoidable. What more if you already have a sexual attraction to a certain someone? 

If you are both single, no one can stop you from being flirty with each other. Sexual tension, fun, and flirting can make us feel so alive. 

Who knows, you might find yourself falling deeper. 

To understand if someone is flirting with you, here are some signs to look for.

4. They appear in your dreams

Another sign of sexual attraction is when you dream about this person.

Your subconscious is still working even in your sleep, you may not admit it, but your mind won’t lie to you. 

Your mind could recognize sexual attraction, even if you deny it. 

5. You feel awkward

You’re alone with this person and don’t know what to say, so you just smile, yet you feel awkward and tense. 

You feel it, don’t you?

Maybe, you forgot what you were about to say? Did you just stutter when you’re telling a joke? Awkward! 

That’s okay; it’s just a sign that you’re feeling the sexual tension.

Related Reading: 5 Ways to Cure Awkward Silences with Your Partner

6. Other people see your ‘flirty’ connection

Co-workers, friends and even your family think you look good together. They know that your chemistry is too good not to notice. 

If other people could sense the sexual tension between, maybe it’s time that you admit it too. 

Also Try: Do We Have a Real Chemistry Quiz

7. Your heart skips a beat when you’re with them

Did your heart just skip a beat when this person came closer? 

Remember how you felt this way when you were just a teen? The fun, flirty feeling of butterflies in your stomach is another indication that you are attracted to this person sexually. 

8. You want to be closer

You get nervous, you feel tense, but you still want to be closer. 

Your body and actions dictate that you want to be closer to each other. It’s unavoidable because sexual attractions are powerful. 

Related Reading: 16 Ways to Grow Closer to Your Mate This Year

9. You tease each other

In some cases, people who are sexually attracted will tease each other. It’s another great way to flirt and to test the waters. 

A wink, a tickle, or maybe a lingering stare can already give you an electrifying feeling. 

10. The ‘I bet’ game is always present

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where someone would give you the ‘I bet’ game? 

“I bet you’re a lousy kisser.”

A statement that seems like a dare, right? So, if you’re single, and you also feel the sexual tension, would you give in? 

“I bet you’re already falling in love with me.”

Another statement that gives you a hint that this person is into you.

If you feel the same, that’s what makes you sexually attracted to someone.

Conclusion

Now that you are aware of what is sexual attraction and how it works, you will know how to respond to it. You would also be able to differentiate it from the romantic attraction.

Sexual attraction is something that we will all feel, and it shouldn’t alarm us. Instead, understanding how it works will give us a better insight into how we can determine what we really feel.

Being attracted to someone is always a good thing as long as we know our limitations and our own feelings.