There are many different types of sex. There are quickies, rough, passionate, make-up, and of course, romantic sex. And why shouldn’t sex be romantic? Being intimate with your spouse is the closest bond you will ever experience with someone else. You’re sharing your bodies and your hearts.
Is there any way you build romance before sex without it seeming like you’re trying to replicate a cheesy romance novel? The task may be difficult for those who aren’t used to pouring their hearts out during intercourse.
Romance should be a vacation, not a brief stopover before sex. By building up romance before sex, you’re improving your intimate experience with your spouse and developing a deeper connection.
That’s why we’re giving you 7 of the best tips for building romance before sex.
1. Build up emotional intimacy
Before sex, couples want to feel passionate excitement for one another. It’s this sexual chemistry that is essential for an amazing roll between the sheets. It’s also pivotal for building up romance before sex.
A quickie is fun every now and again, but you need to slow things down a little if you want to build up romance before sex. Take your time and enjoy being intimate with your partner. Hold each other, kiss and explore one another, whisper sweet nothings, cuddle, and build up to the sex itself.
Foreplay is another way you can take your time and build romance before sex. Foreplay shows your partner you desire them and enjoy spending your time pleasing them.
When you’re lying down with your partner, don’t hurry to cross the finish line. Instead, take it slow and enjoy the moment you’re sharing together. This will make your experience much more romantic.
3. Healthy communication is key
Communication is the cornerstone of a healthy marriage. Couples need to be able to communicate about problems, hopes, and dreams. Talking is also how couples get to know one another better and maintain a fun and rewarding marital friendship – not to mention a great sex life!
The simplest way to increase romance before sex is to make sure you’re creating the right atmosphere for romance.
Research tells us that high levels of stress can have a devastating effect on your libido, so watch what you talk about before becoming intimate.
Discussing finances, the kids, or any other stressful topics should be taken completely off the table. Instead, stick to compliments and whispering in your lover’s ear.
Light candles. Fill the entire bedroom with pillar candles or some great scented ones and light them. You could also opt for string lights if you have them. This low lighting creates a sensual mood.
Music and background noise also play a big role in building romance. For example, you wouldn’t want to hear the kids screaming and playing downstairs when you’re trying to be intimate with your spouse. Instead, choose an evening for romance where you know you’ll have privacy and can carry on without distraction.
Playing some jazz, a romantic playlist, or having a roaring, crackling fireplace to sit in front of is another great way to build a sensual ambiance before sex.
5.Reminisce for romance
A study published in the Journal of Positive Psychology found that reminiscing can be therapeutic and improve your life satisfaction. Study participants who reminisced on positive memories regularly experience a reduction in symptoms of depression as well as boosted self-esteem, happiness, and overall well-being.
Reminiscing can also be an incredible turn-on and a great way to increase the romance in your marriage.
Cuddle up to your spouse and recount your favorite romantic memories. Talk about sweet gestures from the past, your wedding day, or recall some of the most romantic sexual experiences you’ve shared together.
Eye-contact is an incredibly sexy and intimate thing to do while making love. There’s something so vulnerable about looking your partner in the eye while being together.
Studies reveal that eye-contact has a strong connection to both love and lust. Further research says that eye-contact creates a natural self-awareness and heightened sense of intimacy, so how better to build romance before sex than with a little old-fashioned eye-contact?
Whether you’re in or outside the bedroom, you can boost marital romance by maintaining eye-contact with your spouse. Not only will this build intimacy, but it shows your partner that they have your undivided attention and affection.
The video below discusses how to gauge if someone is interested in you by way of eye contact. Have a look:
7. Enjoy each other
Having sex should be a wonderful experience that brings you and your spouse closer together. In fact, studies show that the oxytocin released during lovemaking contributes to a boost in spousal trust, lowered anxiety, and promotes bonding in couples.
Sex is inherently intimate, so stop fighting against it! Think about the person you are having sex with and all the reasons why you love them. Then, use intercourse as a way to express this love. Don’t be afraid to let your emotions spill out along the way. After all, being vulnerable with your partner is what creates true intimacy.
Building up romance before sex is a great way to enhance your emotional and physical experience during intercourse. Build sexual chemistry by having regular date nights together, work on communication, and set the mood for romance. Doing so will improve both your marriage and your sex life.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. As a writer at Marriage.com, she is a big believer in living consciously and encourages couples to adopt this principle in their lives too. Sylvia believes that every couple can transform their relationship into a happier, healthier one by taking purposeful and wholehearted action.