Even with the best circumstances, a divorce will be extremely difficult. Between the emotion of an ended relationship and the stress of the court procedures, it will be a hard time for all involved. While you must deal with this, there are some other difficulties that can make things even worse if you are not prepared. Here we have some of three of the more common difficulties encountered in a divorce and ways to overcome them.
1. Letting emotions cloud your judgement
With all of the stress that comes with a divorce, it will be difficult to make good decisions. Anger at your ex and the fear of what comes next can make choices that you later regret. The first thing that you can do in order to overcome this is to attempt to work through your emotions before making any important decisions. Talk it through with people you can trust, such as family or friends, or even with a counselor or therapist. Before making a decision that might affect your future, talk to your attorney. They can help you to make a rational choice rather than one based on emotion.
There are many ways that social media can be a trap, particularly during an emotional time such as a divorce. Whether the one posting is you or your ex, it is generally best to stay off social media during the court proceedings or even have your account temporarily shut down.
While social media may seem like a good way to keep people up-to-date on what is going on, it can easily turn to ranting, which is not healthy and could be hurtful and cause more problems. Things you post might even be used against you in court. Also, reading your ex-partner’s social media is also a bad idea, as it can cause hurt and anger, neither of which are things you need more of in a situation like this. They may even use it as a means to purposefully hurt you, in which case you should show the posts or messages to your attorney.
Another good reason to temporarily shut down your accounts is that even what your friends post and tag you in could be brought against you. If you leave them active, be active in monitoring them. Also, make sure that anything that your friends tag you in can’t be used against you.
Also watch: 7 Most Common Reasons for Divorce
3. Not documenting
While compiling documentation can be tedious, it can also have a huge impact on your case. Make sure to keep all of your texts and emails, and share them with your attorney. However, these can easily be manipulated, and so they aren’t always reliable or able to be used in your case. Besides written communication, phone calls and conversations are nearly impossible to document. Because our memories are never as reliable as we think they are, this can lead to two completely different versions of a conversation.
A better method would be to use a tool or app that documents your communication for you, such as the message board on the OurFamilyWizard website. All messages are recorded and time stamped, and can easily be shared with attorneys. This way you have a clear history of what everyone has said. The OurFamilyWizard website’s level of documentation is reliable, and the use of it has even been court mandated in many high-conflict cases.
Knowing what difficulties lie in getting divorced can make dealing with them much easier. Dealing with these difficulties early can minimize or eliminate their impact. Make sure that these problems don’t catch you by surprise.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
The end of a marriage or other relationship is not easy, especially if you have children together. Children rely on their parents to make sure that everything is taken care of. In some cases, communication between parents may be difficult. The OurFamilyWizard website was originally designed to reduce some - if not all - of the stress from communicating and planning between parents who live in separate households, but now nearly any family could benefit from it. The OFW website reduces divorce conflict between you and your co-parent by providing a central, secure location to document and share important information about your family. Schedule parenting time, share vital information and manage expenses like un-reimbursed medical all through OFW.