Marriage is an interesting but quite frustrating journey, just like every other essential trip you have to make in life. Your love life is something you want to consider investing in. If you are taking a trip to somewhere, for example, there are many routes that may lead to that destination but some few are the best. At times when you don’t know the way, you often engage the aid of your GPS (the geographic positioning system). The equipment leads you with a voice, which guides step by step how you move to that your determined destination. One thing you do with this is that:
1. You set a destination from the beginning of the trip – this helps to focus the attention of the GPS to where you are going.
2. There are allowances for a detour when there is an error – in case you miss your road along the line, it automatically redirects and still takes you there.
3. You can decide to follow or not – no matter how many times the equipment guides, you are the one who decides whether you will follow or not.
4. When you follow strictly you always arrive on time – this is so sure. Your obedience to the instructions eases you of so much trouble along the trip.
5. The GPS takes you through the best route ever by avoiding the obstructions on the journey.
The above analogy can be used to give a vivid description of how our marriages are crafted to work out:
Having a vision is a great way to make your marriage succeed
Yeah, just like the GPS machine before you embark on your journey you must plan out and program the expected destination. In the same way, your marriage is an institution created by God-given for you and your spouse to run. Set a vision for your marriage, set goals for what you want to achieve. What are the dreams you desire since you were young and single, don’t let those dreams die.
The marriage institution is supposed to enhance those dreams and not to kill them. In fact, you now have better chances of fulfilling those dreams other than doing it alone. You now have a better advantage to work it out with your partner. Two good heads are better than one so they say.
- Decide how many children you intend to have;
- What kind of home will you like to stay together?
- When do you intend to retire?
- What do you plan to do after retirement?
You can have short term, medium and long-term vision. They will help channel the course of your marital journey.
Your vision fuels your life’s mission to a successful marriage
Your mission is your assignment in life. Another way to make your marriage succeed is to allow for detours. Everything may not always work out the same way you have planned it. However, you can be flexible to change whenever the situation demands. There is a particular reason you were married to your own spouse and not somebody else.
Have you stopped to ever think this way? The marriage is a combustion force to propel you to unimaginable heights. Once you get it right, you are sure you will both live right and finish well.
Trust is an essential key to a successful marriage
Again, trust and obedience is another way to make your marriage succeed. Although, like the GPS you are not mandated to heed to the directions communicated. In fact, you actually have a choice to either follow or not. Trusting each other and obeying God in your marriage will keep you on top. Following direction and being obedient to one another always makes you get to your destination and even get there much more quickly than if you didn’t heed each other’s trust.
Your vision that you set for your marriage gives you a compelling reason to follow suit. It’s like a laid down guide to follow. There are certainly many distractions that will come along your marriage journey: friends, work, community engagement, religious activities, children, finance, health and other issues. However, there is no force that can stop a determined mind.
You are focused because you have a set destination in mind so all your strength and passion are channeled towards that vision. Those words in the scripture which says if somebody’s eye is single his whole body will be full of light validates that.
Never allow pro-vision take away your vision
The beauty of setting marital vision together is the fulfilment of that same vision. In reality, it is not always easy. In pursuing your marriage goals at times you might be tempted to neglect the important things at the expense of the mundane things. For your marriage to succeed you must focus on the important things by channeling more time and effort to them. In my own opinion and from my 14 years of marriage experience your marriage is better when ‘kept’ in God’s hand. Let him guide and lead you all the way. You can be sure you will land safely and successfully.
Provision is a way you work hard by your strength and human connection to meet the needs of the family. The basic necessities of life: food, shelter and clothing that really make live enticing. Furthermore, in the process of achieving these many marriages have failed woefully. This is because couples now have little or no time to share together, cuddling, talking and sharing affections together. They often don’t even have enough family time and the children from such homes suffer greatly for this. But come to think of it, how can your marriage be strong, better and successful this way?
Keeping healthy boundaries is another to make your marriage successful
As you journey in your marriage, there are many other variables and factors that come to place ranging from family, in-laws, co-workers and friends. There are times when friends may want to take your time, in need of your attention.
Again, after your relationship with God, your next important thing is your marriage and relationships. It is important to set boundaries as to limit of time to share with other people apart from your spouse and indeed family. This is not meaning to be selfish but prioritizing sets things in the right order. Many cases of infidelity have been uncovered through unhealthy friendships with coworkers. Therefore be observant and stay alert at all times.
Engage the influence of harmony
Empirical reports have shown that united couples who are united are hardly divorced. Unity, as it depicts, is the act of oneness in purpose, vision and in character. Husband and wives are able to achieve more result than when not united. They are able to make benefiting decisions, not only on their lives but also on their children and close family matters. They are not divergent. Unity brings growth, progress and a better marriage.
List forgiveness in your calendar
Forgiveness is a huge one. If your goal is to see your marriage succeed. Truth be told, there are no two different people living together that will not step on each other’s toes from time to time. But when a heart of forgiveness flows between both spouses, they will conquer the many dangers lurking at the doors for the joy and peace of their successful marriage.
Maintain true love with each other
Love is the bond that makes you feel you are a perfect match for each other! Love is such a beautiful thing. Be intentional to grow this love from time to time. This is what will keep the union. No power can conquer true love.
Hence, when the trials and storms come in your marriage the love you have planted, nurtured and grown together will now be harvested to cater for inherent lapses that may occur due to the unavoidable factors of marital livelihood.
Your marriage success is absolute
The success of your marriage is paramount above all hence. But it takes time and intentional efforts to see this to fruition. Therefore, having a vision for your marriage and diligently following through the aforementioned factors listed above is good enough to provoke a good success in marriage. No excuses, no matter how huge enough is acceptable for failure.
Success is the goal that every marriage seeks. Only those who follow prepared patterns actually reach to that point of success indeed. Certainly, your marriage will succeed when you have a propelling vision; you trust each other, keep healthy boundaries, engage the influence of harmony, always forgive and have true love.