5 Tips for Keeping Your Marriage Happy and Light
There is never a perfect formula for marriage; each couple is unique and different. As part of that uniqueness, the problems and challenges that arise will likely vary as well. Rather than focusing on the hardships, take the following humorous advice into consideration.
1. Remember, you signed the terms & conditions
You may not always understand your spouse, but you still said “I agree.” Signing the marriage license is more than just a requirement of the law. It is a contract, a covenant or promise, you have made with witnesses to love and cherish one another for life. While forever may not be in everyone’s future, marriage is hard work and takes commitment to those “terms and conditions”. There is no doubt about it – in the case of marriage, the terms and conditions always apply.
2. “I understand” and “you’re right” are not just suggestions
As traditional and silly as it may sound, understanding that your wife is always right is a key foundational element of marriage. This does not necessarily mean that she is really and truly always right. But the adage that a happy wife means a happy life is not too far off the mark. Sometimes the argument is just not worth having. Sometimes the battle is one that should not be picked. Alternatively, apologies, even if you do not feel you have done wrong, will go a long way towards showing your wife just how important she is for you.
3. Turn the tables on fighting and bring out the “big guns”
Fights and disagreements are a natural part of any relationship, including marriage. There will be times when you and your spouse are unable to come to the same conclusion and compromise must take place. Compromise is never easy, because it means that neither person is getting everything they want. Rather than letting compromise cause dissatisfaction and frustration, use it to your advantage! Right now, during a time of peace and calmness between the two of you, come up with a strategy for how you will respond to disagreements. Make a plan for how things will be if you have to compromise, and include something fun! For example, if you and your spouse have recently engaged in an argument, relieve the tension by setting up a Nerf gun war or water balloon fight. No adult is too old to have this kind of fun with the person they love. And since this kind of fun involves competition, it can allow the tension that has built as a result of arguing and disagreeing to resolve naturally through physical activity and a mildly competitive atmosphere.
4. Sometimes it’s okay to act like a child
Sometimes being an adult is difficult. Being a married adult and responsible for a relationship is even harder. Many of us want to, at times, engage in the simplicity that we knew as children. This simplicity may come in the form of avoiding your responsibilities or can come in the form of joking about things rather than taking them seriously. Note that when it comes to being a spouse, there will be appropriate times for you to think and act like a child. It is okay to have fun with your spouse! In fact, it can be extremely healthy for you and your spouse to spend time with one another that is geared toward fun and creativity rather than daily routine and seriousness. This kind of behavior has to be used wisely, and always at the right time. Being childish, on the other hand should rarely if ever happen in the course of your relationship. Acting as a child and having fun is far different from being childish. Understand the fine line between the two and maintain that balance in order to reap the benefits of knowing how to have fun with your partner!
5. Don’t take yourselves so seriously!
Along with allowing yourself to sometimes act like a child, it is important to not always take one another seriously. This teasing and playfulness must happen at the right time and with the right intentions. But playfulness in your relationship can lead to both emotional and physical intimacy, something both of you may secretly desire on a deeper level.
Want to have a happier, healthier marriage?
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.