Let’s be honest for a minute here. Most people would like to change something about their spouse, if they could. Maybe you just wish they’d stop leaving their socks on the floor, or would listen better when you talk. Maybe it’s the way they always have their phone in their hand, even during dinner.
It’s natural to get a little bit irritated at our partner sometimes. We’re only human after all, and so are they. In fact there are probably a few things in your partner you wish they could change too!
But what would people really change if they could? Research company Ginger Research recently carried out a poll on 1500 married couples and asked them what they wished could be different about their partner. What would people really like to change about their spouses? Let’s find out.
Women wish men were less grumpy
Top of women’s wish list was for men to be less grumpy. A whopping 35% of respondents flagged up their partner’s grumpiness as their number one gripe.
It’s an interesting role reversal from the traditional (and frankly outdated) idea of men not understanding women’s feelings.
For well over a quarter of women, their marriage would be happier if their partner was happier, or at least, less grumpy.
Men wish women were more affectionate
Perhaps one of the most surprising findings from the survey is that the top complaint for men is that they wish their wives were more affectionate. Almost a quarter of men (23%) said that they wished their partners were more affectionate towards them.
One wouldn’t automatically think of men craving affection but in fact, the top wish for husbands in the survey was more affection from their wives.
Men would change more things than women
Overall, men wanted to change more things than their ladies! Men on average had a list of six things they wished they could change about their partner, while women listed only four.
Men are less interested in appearances than women think
Women often think that men are invested in how they look or how much they weigh – and for those ladies, this survey had some great news! Although 16% of men did wished their wives would dress sexier but in general, appearance wasn’t mentioned often. In fact, 12% of men wished their wives would stop obsessing over diet and exercise.
Women on the other hand, were more interested in changing the physical appearances of their partners, mentioning that they wished their partners would dress sexier, lose the beer belly, have better hair, and even be taller!
What else would people change?
Apart from expecting less grumpiness and more affection, the poll found a range of wants for husbands and wives.
Men’s top wishes included that their wives could be happier, tidier around the house, more adventurous in bed, and would appreciate them more. Further down the list, men wished for their wives to spend less money, be less of a control freak, and stop watching bad TV shows. What should they replace them with? Sports channels, of course! 10% of men wished their wives were more into sports, while 8% wanted their partners to share their taste in films.
Women’s top wishes included that their husbands could listen to them more, drop their bad habits, appreciate them more and help more around the house. Further down the list, women wished for their husbands to do more with the kids, like the same TV shows as their wives, be more confident in the bedroom and be more emotionally intelligent.
Is there an ideal compromise on the horizon?
This interesting little survey shows that although men and women want different things, the same desires are the heart of all the answers: to be appreciated more, to have more fun in relationships, and to feel loved, understood and supported.
After all, perhaps men would be less grumpy if they got the affection they sought, and perhaps men would get affection if they were less grumpy! It seems like the real answer is to work on love, communication, respect, and taking out time for each other.