The time has finally come, and your big day is just around the corner. Credit cards are charged, flights are booked, and unfamiliar names are invited. Suddenly, feelings of joy and excitement are replaced with a dark cloud of overwhelm.
You spent too much time and money to feel this way and want to shift your emotional state to let the sunshine back in. Let’s cover some actionable strategies of how to deal with wedding stress and shift away from overwhelm and towards more happiness instantly.
How does feeling anxious differ from feeling excited for you?
You may be hard-pressed to answer this question because the body sensations are precisely the same. The only difference is the label and interpretation we give to those sensations.
Imagine it’s the day before your wedding, and your nervous system is highly activated. If you’re focused on meeting the expectations of others, you’ll interpret your activated nerves as anxiety. If instead, you’re focused on how grateful you are for this moment to finally arrive, you will interpret the same activated nerves as excitement.
The same nerves are activated, yet with a completely different interpretation based on your attention and focus. You may not be in control of how much alcohol Uncle John consumes, but you are in control of where you focus your attention.
These are all common symptoms of pre-wedding stress. There’s a comfort in knowing that these feelings are a natural part of a bride or groom’s wedding experience. These feelings exist to serve us.
Let’s talk about why you’re experiencing these feelings.
Why do we feel Pre-wedding stress?
We feel pre-wedding stress because our body is inviting us to manage our thoughts, energy, and attention. You can view these feelings as an opportunity to become more mindful and conscious of where you’re allowing your attention to go.
Your wedding is a fantastic day that you’ve waited a long time to experience. Refuse to allow negative self-talk or pleasing others to be your focus. Maintain your focus on the two of you and the excitement of your future together.
You’ll soon notice your pre-wedding stress melting away.
How to deal with wedding stress?
Let’s talk about three simple and effective ways for you to manage wedding anxiety better. These strategies will help you enjoy your wedding day the way you deserve to.
Feeling overwhelmed by the entire wedding process is okay. So, here are some effective tips on how to deal with wedding stress.
Managing your thoughts
Here’s a straightforward strategy for how to deal with wedding stress and help you manage your thoughts and decrease the feeling of being overwhelmed.
Imagine yourself as the gatekeeper to the thoughts that want to enter your mind. You can’t control who pulls up to the gate; however, you can control who you allow through it.
With this analogy in mind, ask yourself if your current thoughts serve you or not. If you’re feeling overwhelmed by wedding planning or have wedding planning stress, you’re letting negative thoughts pass through the gate.
Realize that you cannot control the thoughts that arrive in your mind; you can only control what you do with them.
Action step: To keep a check on the stress before your wedding, get into the habit of asking yourself if your current thoughts serve you and adjust appropriately.
The power of perspective
One of the most powerful actions you can take to decrease your wedding planning anxiety is to shift your perspective.
“If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change” – Wayne Dyer.
Your perspective, or the way you see things, determines your emotional response to them.
Imagine you start thinking about how much money you have spent on your wedding. If you choose to look at your wedding as a considerable expense, your emotional response may be frustration, anger, or resentment.
If instead, you choose to look at your wedding as the union of two connected souls, your emotional response may be joy, happiness, or love.
You will certainly have moments when you bounce back and forth between these two perspectives. Which will you allow to dominate your thoughts and marinate most in your mind?
Action step: Choose the perspective that best serves you and elicits desirable emotions.
The greatest gift that separates us from all the other species is the human imagination.
Many of us spend too much time imagining what could go wrong and suffer the emotional consequences of this act. It’s time to start imagining what will go right and what you desire to happen.
It is impossible to feel overwhelmed while imagining a scene in your mind where you are surrounded by people that love you. The act of mental rehearsal paves the road for you to create the wedding of your dreams instead of passively hoping for it.
For dealing with wedding stress, imagine the look on your spouse’s face the moment you say I do. Picture yourself dancing without a care in the world, enjoying the present moment.
Action step: Imagine a scene in your mind using all five senses and feel the emotions that result from this.
Check out this video on how you can manifest a happy marriage:
Feel desirable emotions
When it’s all said and done, the end product of any experience is an emotion. The way we remember important events in our life is based on the emotions we attach to them.
I imagine the feeling of overwhelm would not be one you wish to be attached to this momentous occasion.
As a solution to how to deal with wedding stress, shift your focus and attention in a direction that elicits more desirable feelings. Think about the friends you’re excited to see. Get excited to create new, long-lasting memories. This is your day so start claiming it as such.
Action step: Shift your thoughts in a direction that elicits the emotions you wish to feel.
Once you know how to deal with wedding stress, you are definitely going to live the wedding of your dreams. You now have plenty of tools you can count on to avoid feeling that wedding overwhelm. Put the action steps into motion and start looking forward to this special occasion.
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.