You know what it looks like, but you have no idea how to find it. You have seen it on the movie screen and possibly in the relationships of those close to you. But for whatever reason, it has escaped you time and time again. It’s called love.
So many of us are looking for it, but only a lucky few find it in its purest form. The goal of this article is to guide you to be one of those lucky people. Let’s look at the best ways to create amazing love in your life.
This seems a touch too simple, right? Although it is awfully basic advice, it’s important that you sit with it for a minute and let it sink in.
One of the biggest reasons that relationships sputter out is because the charade that you put forth, in the beginning, is too starkly contrasted to who you are in real life. When you meet someone, both of you put on quite a show to impress the other. That’s all well and good, but eventually, those grand gestures and big personalities will shrink down to size.
If you’re not that into basketball, but the guy that you meet is, don’t pretend to love his favourite team just because you think it will make him like you more. Be honest and let him know that it’s not really your cup of tea, but you’d be happy to join him as he watches something he loves.
If you hate the show that she LOVES, don’t act as though you do. For one, she’ll sniff that out faster than you’d ever expected. For two, that plan will eventually fall on its face.
In both of these cases, you’re creating an expectation that you are interested in something that you can’t stand. When the truth is revealed that you’re not really into it, this will chip away at the beautiful mental construct your partner has of you. They’ll think a little less of you because you “all of a sudden” aren’t interested in the same things you are.
You’ll be better off being honest and upfront about who you are as a person. Show the world who you really are and you’ll find that the people that you’re meant to spend your time with will come running to you.
2.Be complete with or without someone else
It’s almost cliche to just tell you to “love yourself”. But within the cliche lies some wisdom. Before you go looking for someone else to complete you, take the time to feel loved and complete with no one else around.
The reason that this is so important is that you will love more fearlessly if you aren’t super worried about losing it. When you need someone else in your life, you tend to keep your cards close to your chest and try to strategize your relationship.
“Well, I want to show her I love her, but I don’t want to go overboard. I don’t want her to think that I’m needy.”
If you are completely content with being alone, you will make a much more amazing partner. You will wear your heart on your sleeve and know that if everything falls apart, you will still have yourself amongst all the wreckage.
One thing to note here: when you love yourself first, it doesn’t mean that you won’t want love from someone else. It just means that you won’t need that attention and support. You can be good by yourself or great within a loving relationship.
3. Laugh it up
When most people think about love, they think poetic thoughts and meaningful moments. It tends to be very serious stuff. But love is also about laughter. Why do you think romantic comedies are so popular? Seeing love intertwined with humour makes us all happy humans.
Don’t take yourself too seriously.
Don’t take your partner too seriously.
Don’t take the status of your relationship too seriously.
When you laugh, you flash the most authentic smile you have over and over again. Your partner deserves to see that kind of joy on a daily basis. Laugh more and you’ll find yourself more in love with your partner and your life.
4. Forgive your past
Whether it be forgiving an ex who treated you terribly or forgiving yourself for something you did in a past relationship, make sure that you act on the notion of forgiveness as you feel it.
By not forgiving those past memories, you’re staying stuck in that timeline and that mindset. You’re trying to rewrite something that is permanently set in stone.
Your past partners were human, just as you are. Everybody made mistakes, so it’s best that you let them go.
If you get enraged over someone that reminds you of your ex-boyfriend that you haven’t taken the time to forgive, there’s no chance that you’ll find love with that person.
If you can’t forgive yourself for something that you did to an ex-girlfriend, you’ll probably find yourself doing more of it in relationships to come.
When you don’t forgive, you welcome the vicious cycle of behaviour to repeat itself. Forgive anything that’s going to stand in the way of love finding its way to you. You’ll probably find that there’s more to forgive than you think.
You may think that you don’t have much control over how much love you can create in your life, but in reality, you do. If you work on yourself, love yourself, laugh a little more, and forgive the past that has haunted you, you will put yourself in a position to welcome an abundance of beautiful love into your life.
Good luck my friends!