How to Deal With Someone Who Lies All the Time?

Unlock Daily 30-Sec Tips for a Happier Relationship
👉 Subscribe FREEKey Takeaways
Marriage.com AI Quick Summary
Dealing with dishonesty can feel quietly exhausting… especially when it keeps happening. When the truth feels blurry, and stories keep changing, it’s natural to feel confused, hurt, or even a little off-balance.
You might start questioning conversations, memories, or your own reactions—“Am I overthinking this?” or “Why does this keep happening?”
Loving, working with, or caring about someone who lies all the time can stir frustration and sadness at once. At the same time, there’s often empathy mixed in, because constant lying rarely comes from nowhere.
It’s usually rooted in fear, insecurity, or a need for control. Finding steadiness in this situation takes patience, clarity, and self-protection… all at once.
Why do some people lie all the time?
Some people lie more often not because they’re “bad people,” but because lying becomes a habit or a default way to cope with discomfort, fear, or pressure.
If you ever wonder what do you call someone who lies all the time, terms like habitual liar or pathological liar are used for extreme, persistent patterns.
Often, though, someone who lies all the time is trying to protect themselves, avoid conflict, or maintain an image—sometimes without fully realizing how automatic the behavior has become.
A research paper published in 2019 states that a study of young adults found that about 18% reported lying every day, and frequent liars tended to have lower self-esteem, poorer quality of life, and more negative impacts on school, social, and family life compared with those who lied less often.
Please note:
Habitual lying isn’t always permanent. Many people improve when they feel safe, understood, and gently held accountable. With awareness, clear boundaries, and support, honest communication can slowly replace old patterns—without shame or blame.
Harmless lies vs. harmful lies: What’s the real difference?
Not all lies carry the same weight. A small, kind lie may protect feelings, while repeated dishonesty can quietly damage trust.
A research paper published in Psychology in Russia: State of the Art states that people judge lies differently across ages, with white and prosocial lies seen as more acceptable, influencing how often individuals lie.
Understanding this difference matters, especially when dealing with someone who lies all the time, where patterns matter more than intentions.
Basis Harmless lies Harmful lies
Intent Meant to protect feelings Meant to deceive or control
Frequency Occasional Repeated or habitual
Impact Little to no long-term harm Breaks trust over time
Accountability Admitted when needed Often denied or hidden
Effect on relationships Maintains peace Creates confusion and hurt
How to deal with someone who lies all the time: 7 ways
Dealing with repeated dishonesty can feel draining and confusing. When trust keeps getting shaken, it’s important to respond calmly, protect your boundaries, and stay grounded in reality. These approaches help you stay steady, clear, and emotionally safe—without turning every interaction into a battle.
1. Stay calm and don’t react emotionally
When lies surface, your first reaction might be anger or disbelief, but strong emotions often make things worse. Staying calm keeps the conversation grounded in facts rather than blame. It also prevents the liar from deflecting or escalating the situation.
A steady tone shows confidence and control. Calm responses reduce their power over the situation.
Try doing this:
- Pause before responding
- Keep your voice neutral
- Focus on facts, not feelings
2. Address the lie, not the person
Calling someone a liar often leads to defensiveness and denial. Instead, point out the inconsistency you noticed without attacking their character. This keeps the conversation safer and more productive. It also signals that honesty matters to you. You’re addressing behavior, not identity.
Try doing this:
- Say, what doesn’t add up
- Ask for clarification
- Avoid labels or accusations
3. Set clear boundaries around honesty
Boundaries are essential when dealing with dishonesty. Be clear about what you will and won’t accept in conversations or decisions.
If lies continue, follow through with consequences calmly. Consistency matters more than threats. Boundaries protect your mental space.
Try doing this:
- State expectations clearly
- Limit sensitive discussions
- Follow through consistently
4. Don’t play detective
Constantly checking facts can exhaust you emotionally. While it’s okay to verify important things, you don’t need to investigate every detail. Over-monitoring keeps you stuck in anxiety. Choose where honesty truly matters. Save your energy for what affects you directly.
Try doing this:
- Pick important issues only
- Stop over-analyzing stories
- Trust patterns, not excuses
5. Watch patterns, not promises
Words are easy; patterns reveal the truth. Someone may apologize or promise change, but actions show real intent. Repeated constant lying and making up stories usually follow a predictable cycle. Observing behavior over time gives clarity. Patterns help you decide your next steps.
Try doing this:
- Notice repeated behaviors
- Track consistency over time
- Adjust expectations accordingly
6. Protect your emotional distance
You don’t have to share everything with someone who breaks trust. Emotional distance is not punishment—it’s self-protection. Limit vulnerability where honesty is missing. This reduces disappointment and emotional harm. Safety comes before closeness.
Try doing this:
- Share less personal info
- Keep conversations surface-level
- Focus on your well-being
7. Decide what role they have in your life
Not every relationship deserves the same access. Sometimes, accepting reality is healthier than hoping for change. When dealing with someone who lies all the time, decide how much involvement feels safe for you. Distance can be loving and necessary. Your peace matters.
Try doing this:
- Reassess your expectations
- Reduce contact if needed
- Prioritize your mental health
5 tips to help someone who lies all the time
Helping a loved one who struggles with honesty requires patience, clarity, and realistic expectations. Change doesn’t happen through pressure or lectures, but through safety, consistency, and accountability. These tips focus on offering support without losing yourself in the process.
1. Create a safe space for honesty
People lie less when they feel emotionally safe. Reacting with anger or judgment often pushes dishonesty underground. Stay calm and open when the truth comes out, even if it’s uncomfortable. This helps reinforce that honesty is safer than lying. Safety encourages change over time.
- Quick tip: Thank them when they tell the truth
2. Gently point out patterns without shaming
Instead of calling out every lie, focus on repeated patterns you notice. Use calm observations rather than accusations. This helps them see the behavior without feeling attacked. Awareness is the first step toward change. Shame usually strengthens lying habits.
- Quick tip: Use “I’ve noticed…” statements
3. Encourage accountability, not excuses
Understanding their reasons doesn’t mean excusing the behavior. Encourage them to take responsibility for their actions and their impact. Accountability builds self-awareness and trust. It also shows that honesty has real value in relationships. Support growth, not avoidance.
- Quick tip: Focus on impact, not intent
Watch this TED Talk by Tasha Eurich, an organizational psychologist who shares a surprising truth: most people think they’re self-aware but aren’t, and learning to ask “what” instead of “why” can deepen self-understanding and personal growth.
4. Suggest professional support when needed
Chronic lying can be tied to deeper emotional issues like insecurity or past trauma. Therapy can help uncover and address these roots safely. Suggest support gently, without forcing it. Professional help often brings lasting change. It’s a strength, not a failure.
- Quick tip: Frame therapy as support, not punishment
5. Protect your own boundaries while helping
Helping doesn’t mean tolerating repeated harm. Set clear boundaries to protect your emotional health. Supporting someone who lies should never come at the cost of your peace.
When helping someone who lies all the time, balance empathy with self-respect. That’s truly how to help someone who lies all the time—without losing yourself.
- Quick tip: Decide what you will and won’t accept
FAQ
When dealing with dishonesty, it’s normal to have lingering questions and mixed emotions. These quick answers address common concerns with clarity, compassion, and practicality—helping you feel more grounded and confident in how you respond.
-
Can a habitual liar change their behavior?
Yes, change is possible when the person becomes self-aware, takes responsibility, and is willing to work on the underlying causes—often with consistent effort and support.
-
Should you confront someone every time they lie?
No. Constant confrontation can escalate conflict. It’s better to address patterns, focus on important issues, and stay calm rather than reacting to every small lie.
-
When is it better to distance yourself from a liar?
If repeated dishonesty harms your mental health or trust despite clear boundaries, creating distance may be the healthiest choice for your emotional well-being.
Choosing clarity
Dealing with someone who lies all the time can be emotionally exhausting, especially when trust keeps breaking. While empathy and understanding matter, so do boundaries and self-respect. You’re allowed to expect honesty, step back when needed, and protect your peace without guilt.
Not every situation can be fixed, and that’s okay. What matters most is staying grounded in reality, trusting patterns over promises, and choosing clarity over confusion. With patience and firm limits, you can navigate dishonesty without losing yourself—or your sense of calm.
Write your tip or submit a video tip
All tips are reviewed before the publishing.
Share this article on
Want to have a happier, healthier marriage?
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Recent Articles
Related Quizzes
Unlock Daily 30-Sec Tips for a Happier, Healthier Relationship
👉 Subscribe FREE on YouTubeAsk your question related to this topic & get the support you deserve from experts.

