5 Reasons Why Happy Couples Post Less on Social Media

Social media is everywhere. We bet you know plenty of people who post every last detail of their lives on social media. Sometimes it seems like you can hardly scroll through your feed without being subjected to the most minute details of your friends’ lives.

It can be wonderful – it’s a great way to keep up with the people you care about – but let’s be honest, it can get a little bit wearing too. And never more so than when it comes to the couples you happen to know on social media.

Some couples put forward such a perfect shiny image that you wonder if their relationship can really be like that. And, truthfully, you get a little bit tired of seeing it. You can even find yourself a little bit jealous, wishing your relationship was like that.

You might even find yourself wondering if you ought to post a bit more. Perhaps you’ve tried it, but it feels a bit weird and false sharing so much about your relationship for the world to see.

According to Maggie Martinez, LCSW:

Think about what you might feel when you see a couple posting frequently about their relationship. Usually, there is trouble in paradise.

Here’s the truth: What you see on social media is what the poster wants you to see. They want to portray their relationship a certain way, so all their posts are curated to reflect that. It’s sad, but often the people who post about their relationships most often, are the most unhappy.

Here are some of the top reasons why happy couples post less about their relationship on social media.

1. They don’t need to convince anyone

Happy couples don’t need to convince anyone else – least of all, themselves – that they are happy. Couples who post constantly about how happy they are are often trying to convince themselves that they’re content with their relationship. They hope that by sharing constant in-jokes, professions of love, and posts about how blissful they are, they’ll make that the reality.

2. They’re not looking for outside validation

Couples who aren’t that secure in their relationship often search for outside validation. They hope that by sharing all those happy couple pictures and stories, they’ll get attention and validation from outside sources.

Likes, hearts, and comments like “aw, you guys” are a great ego boost for couples who are feeling a little insecure.

On the other hand, happy couples don’t need anyone else to validate them. Their own happiness is all the validation they need.

Maggie Martinez highlights that:

Happy couples don’t feel the need to prove anything to anyone about their relationship. In fact, displaying their relationship on social media doesn’t occupy much of their mind.

3. They’re too busy enjoying their relationship 

Are we saying you should never share a selfie from that concert last night, or post pictures of the vacation you just took? Of course not! Sharing moments from your life on social media is fun, and it’s normal to enjoy doing so.

However, when you’re happy in the moment with your honey, you won’t feel the need to document every moment. Sure you might share the occasional snap, but you won’t post in detail. You’re too busy enjoying time together to spend it taking pictures for Facebook.

4. They know better than to fight in public

Happy couples know that one of the secrets to happiness is resolving their issues in private. Have you ever been at a social event with a couple who is fighting? Wow, isn’t that just incredibly awkward? It’s nearly as bad on social media when you see them posting barbs at each other.

Happy couples know that fights have no place in social media. They never feel the need to share all their drama on social media for the world to see. They resolve their problems in private.

Maggie Martinez adds that:

It is toxic behavior to tell social media about your partner or why you may be fighting.

5. They don’t rely on their relationship for their happiness

Couples who post a lot about their relationship on social media are often using it as a crutch. Instead of finding their happiness inside themselves, they’re looking for their partner to provide it for them. Over-sharing on social media is part of that.

Couples who rely on their relationship for their happiness post frequently to remind themselves and the world that they’re happy. Sharing pictures of their daily life as a couple is a way to generate feelings of happiness. They can use the posts and pictures to give their self-esteem a boost and prove that they’re happy.

Happy couples know that the key to a good relationship is being happy in yourself first and then sharing your happiness with your partner. They also know you can’t achieve inner happiness with a social media post.

Is sharing couple pictures and posts on social media always a bad thing? Not at all. Social media is a popular way to keep in touch with the people we care about, and sharing a bit about our lives is a good way to do that. But, as with most things that aren’t 100% healthy, it’s a case of everything in moderation.

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Marriage.com Editorial Team Relationship & Marriage Advice

The Marriage.com Editorial Team is a group of experienced relationship writers, experts, and mental health professionals. We provide practical and research-backed advice on relationships. Our content is thoroughly reviewed by experts... Read more to ensure that we offer high-quality and reliable relationship advice. Read less