13 Things to Do When Your Marriage Feels More Like a Friendship

Marriage can be about various practical considerations, but it is often assumed to be about love, passion, and deep connection. If your marriage feels more like a friendship, it might be missing some of that special spark. This feeling is common and doesn’t mean your relationship is over. 

Instead, it shows that it’s time to make some changes and bring back the excitement that first brought you together. It’s easy to fall into a routine that makes your marriage feel dull.

The good news? You can bring back the passion and turn a friendly partnership into a loving marriage again. Ready to make a change? Keep reading.

13 things you can do when your marriage feels more like a friendship

When your marriage feels more like a friendship, it’s time to bring back the romantic spark. While a strong friendship is important in any marriage, it’s essential to maintain the passion and intimacy that make your relationship special. 

Here are 13 things you can do to revive that connection and keep your marriage feeling vibrant and loving.

1. Schedule regular date nights

Setting aside time for regular date nights can help when your marriage feels more like a friendship. Plan something special, even if it’s just once a week. 

Whether it’s dinner at a favorite restaurant or a movie night at home, date nights remind you of your relationship’s romantic aspect. It’s about prioritizing each other and having fun together.

Sex Therapist Danica Mitchell states,

2. Communicate openly and honestly

One of the reasons your marriage feels more like a friendship might be due to a lack of open communication. Talk to each other about your feelings, hopes, and fears. 

Honest conversations can deepen your connection and help you understand each other better. Don’t shy away from difficult topics; addressing them can bring you closer.

3. Revisit shared goals and dreams

Reflect on the dreams and goals you had when you first got married. Sometimes, life’s demands can make us forget what we once wanted as a couple.

Revisit these goals and see if they still align with your current life. Working together toward shared dreams can reignite your bond and make your marriage feel more purposeful.

4. Try new activities together

When a marriage feels like a friendship, introducing new activities can inject excitement. Try something neither of you has done before, like cooking a new dish, taking a dance class, or traveling to a new place. 

New experiences can create lasting memories and help you see each other in a new light, reigniting your connection.

5. Focus on physical affection

Physical touch is a key element of a romantic relationship. If your marriage feels more like a friendship, increase your physical affection. 

Hold hands, hug, kiss, and cuddle more often. These small acts of love can help rebuild intimacy and remind you of your relationship’s romantic aspect.

6. Surprise each other

Surprises can add a sense of excitement and spontaneity to your marriage. Plan little surprises for your partner, like leaving a sweet note, cooking their favorite meal, or planning a spontaneous outing. 

These gestures show your love and appreciation, helping to keep the romance alive when your marriage feels like friendship.

7. Spend quality time apart

Spending some time apart can actually strengthen your marriage. It allows you both to miss each other and appreciate the time you spend together. 

Pursue individual hobbies, see friends, or take solo trips. This can bring fresh energy into your relationship and help you grow individually, benefiting your marriage.

Danica Mitchell further adds,

8. Reflect on the early days of your relationship

Think back to when you first fell in love. What did you do back then that made your relationship special? Try to bring some of those activities or attitudes back into your current relationship. 

Reminiscing about the early days can remind you why you fell in love and help revive those feelings if your marriage feels more like a friendship.

9. Be supportive and encouraging

Being married and in love with your best friend means being there for each other through thick and thin. Show support and encouragement in your partner’s endeavors. 

Celebrate their successes and be a shoulder to lean on during tough times. This mutual support can strengthen your emotional bond and keep your relationship strong.

10. Work on personal growth

Personal growth can positively impact your marriage. If your marriage feels more like a friendship, focusing on becoming the best version of yourself can reignite your relationship. 

Take up a new hobby, pursue a passion, or work on personal development. When both partners are growing, it brings new energy and excitement into the relationship.

11. Plan a getaway

Sometimes, a change of scenery is all you need to refresh your relationship. Plan a getaway, even if it’s just for a weekend. Being in a new environment can help you relax and reconnect. 

It’s a chance to focus solely on each other, away from the distractions of daily life, and rekindle the romance when your marriage feels more like a friendship.

12. Practice gratitude

Expressing gratitude for your partner can improve your relationship. Take time to acknowledge and appreciate the little things they do. 

Say thank you more often and let them know you value their efforts. This positive reinforcement can create a loving atmosphere and help shift your marriage from feeling like a friendship to a more romantic relationship.

Watch this video where Thais Gibson, a best-selling author and counselor, talks about how to show your partner more appreciation:

13. Seek professional help

If your marriage feels more like a friendship and you struggle to bring back the spark, consider seeking professional help. A marriage counselor can provide tools and strategies to help you reconnect. 

They can offer an outside perspective and guide you through the process of rekindling the romance in your marriage.

Danica Mitchell highlights,

FAQs

Marriage can sometimes be challenging, and many people may have questions about their relationships. Here are answers to some common concerns.

• Is it normal to be unhappy in marriage?

Yes, it’s normal to feel unhappy in marriage at times. Every relationship has ups and downs, and it’s natural to experience periods of dissatisfaction. 

What’s important is addressing the issues causing unhappiness and working together to improve your relationship. Communication, effort, and sometimes professional help can make a significant difference.

• When do you feel like your marriage is falling apart?

You may feel like your marriage is falling apart when there’s constant conflict, lack of communication, or emotional distance. Signs include frequent arguments, avoiding each other, or feeling disconnected. 

It’s essential to recognize these signs early and seek ways to reconnect, whether through open communication, counseling, or spending quality time together.

• When does your marriage feel more like roommates?

Your marriage may feel more like roommates when there’s a lack of intimacy and emotional connection. This can happen when you live parallel lives, focusing more on daily tasks than nurturing your relationship.

To address this, prioritize spending quality time together, engage in activities that strengthen your bond, and ensure you communicate effectively about your needs and feelings.

To sum up

If your marriage feels more like a friendship, it’s crucial to take steps to rekindle the romance and deepen your connection. Start implementing these tips today to transform your relationship and bring back the passion you once shared. 

Remember, every small effort counts and can make a big difference. Don’t wait—take action now to revive your marriage and ensure it remains loving and fulfilling. You have the power to change your relationship for the better, so start today and watch your bond grow stronger.

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Dylan Banks Author

Dylan Banks is a prolific writer, known for his sharp and insightful commentary on relationships, love, and human connection. With his extensive experience and infectious passion for all things love-related, he has become a leading... Read more expert in the field of relationship advice. Dylan is a true romantic at heart, with a deep passion for helping others find love and build meaningful connections. When he’s not writing about love and relationships, Dylan can be found exploring the great outdoors or indulging in his other passion: music. As an accomplished musician and songwriter, he believes that music has the power to connect people in profound ways. Read less

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Sample Question

When you and your partner talk about something important…

We listen with care — even hard talks feel safe and productive

We try to talk, but lately emotional closeness feels harder to reach

I want to be open, but part of me still guards my heart

Our discussions sometimes spiral or end unresolved

It’s hard to feel close because our physical intimacy hasn’t felt strong lately

We often see things differently about goals or priorities

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