5 Worst Mistakes Married People Make
Marriage, the ultimate destination of a relationship is beautiful, heavenly and what not.
Every couple starts this relation with heights of love, zeal and intense feelings that seem to stay lifelong. However, time is the best teacher and as it passes, it shows varied sides and shades of a relation. Married couples are not an exception. With the passing years, they get to see different realities of this relation that may be harsh.
Nothing is impossible including resolution of married life complications if you know where you are going wrong. For that, it is best to know the mistakes people commonly do.
Maybe you can rescue your own relationship before the storm comes.
1. Taking each other for granted
After marriage, people live together and do almost everything together.
Eating, vacationing, future planning, shopping, and the list goes on and on. For sure, you do the same. You know what, you both are so easily available to each other that sometimes any one of you or both of you start taking each other for granted.
Emotional needs, career perspectives, personal thinking, etc. are all personal assets of an individual. If you do not respect that and will ignore, the fragile relationship of marriage may become prone to a sad ending.
Staying together should be strength of a couple and not a compulsion. Pay heed to the concerns of your partner as it brings grace in the relationship.
2. Not doing financial planning together
Oh, this one is a big mistake.
Every person in this world has to have adequate financial back up to stay and survive in this world. When only one person has to take the responsibilities of finances, frustration is sure to come. When this happens, the adversities show their effect on the relationship.
Just look around, there is so much stress out there.
The rat race to earn more, to stay in the job or to do best in business is going on 24×7, 365 days. You too for sure have financial goals and future plans. Some are individual goals and some are for family. They cannot be achieved without mutual consent and contribution.
The man and the woman both have an equal role in financial planning.
However, according to the salary difference the share to save or invest can always be modified. But whatever you do, just do it together. Especially when it comes to obligations, bear the burden together. From a short-term loan to long-term debts, when you share the burden it brings a couple closer.
Before taking any credit card, a loan or any financial product take mutual consent. For instance, even if you are taking a short-term loan, first discuss and see how it can affect your finances. However, with new-age finance industry the financial choices have become quite affordable and flexible.
For instance – British Lenders, an online loan company in the UK offers unprecedented cheaper deals on loans. You can have all your small money needs fulfilled here. However, a second thought on a financial decision is always required.
3. Depending on each other too much
‘Extreme of everything is bad’ too much gap and too much closeness, both are not good for your marriage.
Suffocation is bad not only for health but also for relationships. Let it breathe, get space for yourself and give some space to your partner.
Do not rely on each other too much and the best way to do this is to make your own routine and follow it.
This doesn’t tell to ignore your partner, but to feel self-reliant this is necessary.
It is never a problem to discuss on varied matters with your better half but do not make their presence compulsory for doing everything. Make your own friend circle and stay connected to family members, as one person (life partner) cannot complete all your expectations.
Humans are part of a society and they can flourish better when they stay connected to the community. This, in fact, strengthens your relationship as both of you become mature enough to tackle relations and situations individually.
4. Absence of friendliness invites loneliness
Just recall how close you both were a few days before the marriage.
Eating together, having fun together, movies, late-night parties, weekend trips, romantic dates, Wow what not?
Most importantly, you used to share so many things and day and night never made the difference in your energy to stay invested in the conversation. But what happened to that now?
You both don’t even talk to each other properly, hide many things and stay reserved. Wait a minute, this is not a joke, this is your relationship and that needs to be revived with fresh atmosphere.
Why not become friends once again and share some forgotten experiences and feelings.
No one perhaps can keep your secrets as perfectly as your life partner. But for that, the two sides need to invest and work sincerely. A 100% commitment is required.
5. Keeping anger within yourself is like living on a volcano
Expression of emotions and feelings whether it is love or anger, are necessary to express. Fighting is part of a relationship, and it is not bad to sometimes fight (obviously, not violent) and let the anger come out.
It helps you release all the stress, which cleans the mess of life.
As it is ok to be sad sometimes, it is also fine to fight sometimes. After that when your partner and you sit together to patch up again, those moments become the actual fuel of relationship.
This makes things work longer, with time a couple gets the clarity of what their partner does not like and that should be avoided. Only heat of the sun can make you realise the importance of shadow of a tree.
Fighting makes love more sweet.
Marriage is an amazing thing as this is perhaps the only relationship that can bear most ups and downs.
But make sure it stays strong on every turn. Life is one; use it well for good reasons. Do not spoil it for negative things as it sucks out happiness from the life that you deserve. Avoid the above mistakes and make your relationship last long. Stay together forever.
Marriage is a ‘handle with care’ relation and something that should stay lifelong. If avoiding some mistakes can make it last long then you should certainly know about them to avoid their occurrence.
Want to have a happier, healthier marriage?
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.