Many individuals fall in love and think that love will conquer all and take you through the years. While love would be the main ingredient in a relationship, we must not forget that the other ingredients in making a relationship successful, are communication, trust, and respect.
When you think about it, how can any relationship survive without any one of these ingredients missing?
I have worked with many couples that although they have the core of what may sustain a relationship, one of these is missing either because they have lost it, or because they never had it.
I mean think about it, how long can any relationship last without, communication, trust or respect.
If you are reading this, chances are you are working at making your relationship better, and I commend you for that because many individuals feel that after they have a partner, that’s where it stops, when in all honesty, this is when it starts because working on your relationship should be a lifelong commitment.
Individuals should never stop trying, your relationship is the single most important aspect of your life, and yes it can be, amazing.
Communication is the fundamental and most integral part of a relationship, let’s face it if you do not have it, what do you have?
It is important to have communication with your partner, and it needs to be open and honest. Many couples have difficulty being open and honest. In any case, they are never true to themselves or their partner.
Individuals should have no inhibitions which would prevent them from sharing with their partners. Many times, individuals marry or partner up, and they have different cultural backgrounds, or they were raised with different norms and values.
Therefore, individuals need to take time to get to know each other, at the beginning of the relationship. Spend time getting to know each other, ask questions, spend quality time together, get comfortable having difficult conversations, or discussing difficult topics.
Tips for healthy communication
- Be honest and open, if something makes you uncomfortable let your partner know, share why it makes you feel this way, explore options and practical ways in which you would feel better at discussing certain issues or topics.
- Ask questions, and clarify.
- Choose a time of day that you will dedicate to practice effective communication, make it your time, whether it’s early morning while you have morning coffee, or late at night.
- Do not have negative conversations before bed, and do not go to sleep angry at your partner.
- It is ok, to agree to disagree, you do not always have to end the conversation with both agreeing on any specific issue, you can always come back to it.
- If someone feels uncomfortable, do not force the issue, pick up the conversation at another day and time if possible.
- Speak in a low and respectful manner; you don’t have to scream to get the point across.
I often wonder, why individuals stop or never treat their other half with the utmost respect. While I often see individuals being respectful to strangers, they often fail to respect the person who they share a life with.
I am sure it wouldn’t hurt to try, some common courtesy with their partners. Let’s face it; some individuals do not even say good morning to each other. They do not say thank you, and they do not even hold the doors or pull out a chair when having dinner, however, they will do it for work partners or strangers.
Many times, while having disagreements individuals will use language that is hurtful and disrespectful, language that they would never use in public, or in front of others, why do they use it with the person they love?
Trust is one of the most important factors in any relationship. Without trust, your relationship is weak and will need work.
Trust is one of those things that when you lose it, it will be very hard regaining it.
Trust may be lost through different actions, and over time, one way of losing a person’s trust is through repeated dishonesty, I mean how can you trust a person who lies over and over.
The other way trust is completely broken it when there is infidelity in a relationship. Many times, this way of breaking trust cannot be repaired. If there is trust in a relationship, the best thing would be not to lose it, communication can be improved, respect can be gained, but trust has to be earned.
While I have worked with individuals that have learned to trust again, it is one of the hardest things to regain after it is broken.