The statistics show us that saving a marriage and maintaining marital satisfaction is quite a challenging goal to achieve. How difficult that task will be depends on many different factors are at play, but there is a reason why entrepreneurs’ marriages are commonly considered especially complicated and not very promising.
It seems that this kind of uncertain and unstable evocation brings troubles when it comes to finding a balance between “life” and “work”. In a beneficial way or not, one is always affecting the other. Both entrepreneurship and marriages are entities of great importance to our society, so we want them to contribute to one another in the best possible way.
Harp Family Institute is focused on this problem specifically. It’s founder, Trisha Harp, has a much more optimistic view on the subject than we’re usually able to hear. What her research is showing is that even 88% of the responders claimed that they would marry again, despite the things they now know about marriage with an entrepreneur.
There is some advice which, if followed, could enhance the chances that this kind of marriage falls into the positive side of the statistics.
1. For better or worse
Metaphorically speaking, marriage is also a form of entrepreneurship.
Both require a high level of dedication and commitment, and go through good and bad times. It is necessary to be prepared for both and to make an understanding that those two polarities are codependent, and how we are dealing with one determines the way we’re gonna handle and use the another.
Trisha Harp claimed that it is critically important for married couples to share everything, not only what seems promising, but also the struggles and failures. She says that partner will always sense if things are not going well, and not-knowing can only make him even more disturbed and anxious. She suggests transparency as the key component for building the patience and trust.
2. Playing on the same side
Whether both partners are entrepreneurs or not, they are the members of the same team, and the best they can do for both their marriage and business is to act that way.
Our environment, has a huge impact on us, so the support and appreciation are vital to every success. Harp’s research showed that those entrepreneurs who shared their goals, views and long-term plans with their partners were way happier than those who didn’t. Even 98 percent of those who shared family goals reported still being in love with their partner.
We already saw how important transparency is, and in order to be that way it is necessary to be committed to quality, open and honest communication. Expressing and truly listen to not only plans and hopes, but also fears and doubts, and talking them through is the only way to build togetherness, understanding, and confidence on both sides.
Mutual respect and solution oriented approach make it way easier to handle every problem, reduces stress, and makes every fall into an opportunity to grow and develop. Constructive communication leads to a calmer mind, and calmer mind makes smarter moves. As Trisha Harp pointed, the partners should keep up with one another both emotionally and intellectually, since “that’s a pretty solid foundation for any marriage”, she said.
4. Insist on quality instead of quantity
Entrepreneurship is often quite time-consuming activity, and that is one of the main reasons most entrepreneur’s spouses are complaining about. Making a path to the success can require a lot of time and effort but, if someone would follow the advice previously stated, that would not represent such a big problem anymore.
Self-realisation is a strong need and important accomplishment for every human being, and good marriage enables and encourages both sides to follow their own path. A lot of free time available won’t mean much if one or both partners feel restrained. People who feel free to follow their dreams and passion, who give that freedom to the other also, cultivating and showing appreciation of their supportive partner, are those who could easily enjoy their marriage, no matter how tidy their schedule might be.
5. Keep it positive
The way we are looking at things strongly influences the experience we’re going to have with them. Such unstable and uncertain lifestyle like entrepreneurs might be considered as a constant danger, but as a constant adventure as well.
As Trisha Harp showed to us, hopefulness and positive approach enable spouses to overcome all the challenges and difficulties that this kind of career might carry.
Entrepreneurship is a brave adventure that probably won’t pay off itself over night, so the patience and faith are the crucial helpers along the way.