12 Things We Only Discover in the First Year of Marriage
No doubt it’s a very special year in the couple’s life, after all the planning, it’s time to enjoy life for two. But no matter how long couples have been together, some things will only be discovered in the first year of marriage.
Want to know what happens in the first year of marriage and the things you learn in the first year of marriage?
Even if the couple has been dating for years, many habits or fads will only surface when they live under one roof. The routine of everyday life will be different from the weekend trips of the dating phase, and some customs can be noticed only when they begin to live together.
Many couples already live together before deciding to marry, already know each other enough. But many go through the period of adaptation together, and that requires patience, respect, and a lot of dialogue.
They have had a great deal of experience when planning wedding decoration spending or dealing with divergences in defining how wedding invitations would look.
So, besides carrying a bouquet from time to time for the wife, or to prepare the favorite dish for the husband, they might have to make adjustments when they realize certain things in this first year of marriage.
Here are 12 things you learn after your marriage that might help you in adjusting to married life:
1. Both must choose the decor of the house
As much as one of you has been right with choosing the blue decoration at the wedding; it does not mean that you should direct the decor yourself. Both need to put their energy into the soul of the house to have their face.
2. Manage money together
If you did not have to account for your salary before, you now have to prioritize household bills. The personal expenses are important but will stay in the background. You may not be able to buy an imported party dress every time you receive an invitation as you used to.
3. Cleaning is part of everyday life
After opening all the presents and organizing the new home comes the least exciting part: cleaning the house. How will you divide the tasks?
Regardless of whether you do not like to wash the dishes or are disgusted with cleaning the toilet, you need to learn how to manage the house.
4. Sharing the bathroom
If you’re used to taking hours to do makeup and straighten your hair, keep in mind that this isn’t about testing the best wedding hairstyle in front of the mirror, your husband also needs adequate time to use the bathroom.
The “I adapt” game will be a constant at home and in the relationship. You will learn to give in to some of each other’s crazes and, over time, will take over and accept some little things that will never change.
Learning to share space is fundamental to evolve in the relationship and live a happy marriage.
6. A bigger bed is a better bed
Sure, at first, it’s all wonderful when you always want to sleep cuddling together, but over time you both need room to sleep, and one of you finds that your space is quite limited.
7. Everyone needs time alone
It is not only because you are married and living in the same space that you need to do everything together. Learning to respect each other’s space is critical so that you do not lose the dimension of who you are as an individual.
A moment alone to read a book or watch a series that the other doesn’t follow, hanging out with friends, is critical and should be viewed in a relaxed and positive way for both of you.
8. Every day will bring discoveries
One day you find out that your husband doesn’t like this dish you love so much, or you find that he scratches his chin when he’s very worried! Yes, every day will be a discovery, and you will know all its strengths and weaknesses. Attention, he has his eye on you too!
9. You can always count on each other
In both good and bad times, you will find that just one hug will be enough to calm down. You will support each other in everything, learn to live with each other’s defeats and victories, and that will make the relationship even stronger.
10. One look will suffice
You may not have understood the moment he looked at you puzzled when you set the square wedding cake, but there will come a time when you won’t have to say anything because you already know each other so well you won’t have to talk at the moment, just one look will suffice.
11. Now “I” has become “we.”
This does not mean that personal projects should be forgotten. But for the relationship to work, before making a decision or planning something that can change their lives, they must think about the “we.”
Openly debating aspirations and listening to what the other has to say is critical to strengthening the relationship.
12. Worth of the effort
When you look back, you will see how much you grew up in that first year of marriage. The effort to have the wedding decoration they wanted so much and all the sacrifice to buy the apartment was well worth it.
Although it is a period of love and you won’t always be sure about what to expect in the first year of marriage, just remember that it is a time of total learning to know each other’s little details better to make them even happier.
So each time you hear the music of the wedding entrance, the memory of such joy will be remembered.
And whenever you look at the photos of the first kiss of the married couple or the toast under the wedding cake, you will be sure how you made the right choice. After all, as the old saying goes, “only love builds.”
Want to have a happier, healthier marriage?
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.