Daily Steps You Can Take to Keep Your Marriage Fresh

Denise Limongello

Denise Limongello, Registered Psychotherapist

Expertise: Registered Psychotherapist

Denise Limongello, LMSW, is a passionate and dedicated therapist who obtained her graduate degree from Columbia University, School of Social Work. She is also a graduate... Read more

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Updated: 25 Oct, 2022

Table of Contents

Intentional, daily connection keeps love alive; carve out regular, distraction-free talks and small compliments to help each partner feel seen and valued.
Gratitude and honest apologies build trust over time; express thanks often and say sorry sincerely when needed to keep the lines of care open.
Shared activities and warmth bring you closer; pick small, enjoyable routines together and offer gentle touches to nurture intimacy and connection.

It is well known that marriages can become stale over time. It is pretty easy for any couple to walk down the aisle, take vows by looking into each other’s eyes and say ‘I do.’

But, how to keep your marriage fresh and alive, even after ten or many more years down the line?

Most of the couples run out of ways to keep their relationship exciting as the years pass by. Couples tend to take their marriage for granted and presume that their relationship should continually sail smoothly without having to put any extra efforts.

Couples need to remember that, when they can’t eat the same food, wear the same clothes and do the same work every day, how can they expect their marriage to not go awry if they keep doing the monotonous things every day?

How to keep a marriage alive?

It needs deliberate and sincere efforts for keeping the spark in a relationship alive and for keeping your marriage fresh.

Do you remember the last time, when the two of you sat down to talk, just about each other or went on a romantic date?

If you need to scratch your head to remember that last time, the two of you spent some quality time with each other, then you need to gear up and take some quick action to spice up your marriage and keeping your love alive.

Couples who report successful marriages often report working at them, consistently. Many people might be unaware, however, that there are a few critical steps that you can take to keep your marriage fresh.

How to keep a marriage fresh?

How to keep a marriage fresh

Here are some healthy relationship tips for couples to keep the romance alive in a marriage, even after several years of being together.

Try to follow these on a daily basis for keeping your marriage alive and exciting, just like it was at the inception.

Take notes

We all have pet peeves, so most likely your spouse has many!

Taking the time to create an inventory of what annoys your spouse the most can be of tremendous importance when working toward making sure you two get along, consistently.

The more aware you are of what annoys your partner, the greater the likelihood that you can avoid mishaps and arguments and keep your marriage fresh.

Trying to be attentive and awake to what bothers your partner can be a great measure for being a considerate partner and can enhance your relationship.

Don’t forget to say thank you

Studies show that people feel increasingly valued when thanked.

Additionally, studies have shown that when feeling valued, it can increase motivation to help those who appreciate them. Making your partner feel valued can undeniably enhance your relationship.

Expressing your heartfelt gratitude will also lead to your partner’s increased motivation to willingly help you and work with you when you need them.

Taking the time to thank your partner, as often as necessary, can be a great way to make sure they feel valued and loved.

Apologize when you falter

When you value your relationship more than your ego, it shouldn’t be a backbreaking task for you to apologize for your mistakes.

Say a genuine sorry, when you happen to botch up any situation or hurt your partner inadvertently. To keep your marriage fresh, try to get your partner talking into what has hurt them so that you can avoid doing so in the future.

If you find your partner irrationally fretting over your actions or behavior, take some time-out and try explaining them later, when they are in a calm state and receptive mood.

Prepare a favorite dish

We all know that certain foods can be associated with celebration. Research shows that preparing food for someone can elevate their mood and make them feel loved and cared for.

Preparing your partner’s favorite dish on any given night, rather than just on special occasions can not only make your spouse feel more loved but also symbolizes that your marriage is a celebration, in and of itself.

Favorite meals or “special dishes” do not, necessarily be reserved for holidays and birthdays.

If you’re not much of a cook, then taking the time to pick up your spouse’s favorite dish from a store can still be a nice surprise to make them feel special and keep your marriage fresh.

Enjoy shared goals together

It is very important as a couple to invest some time doing a few things together, to keep your marriage fresh.

It could be any activity like decorating or cleaning up your house or doing the garden or working out or cultivating a new hobby together.

You can even watch a movie or a television series together, but instead of indulging in some sedentary activity, it is anytime better to indulge in some activity, where the focal point is not the activity, rather the couple time is.

Doing things together, that both of you enjoy can make you discover new facets about each other, that you might not be aware of despite being in a marriage for long.

Work on your intimacy

We are living in a world where even 24 hours seem short to manage our daily chores efficiently, without cribbing.

Office work, kids, and other mundane jobs can bog you down so much that physical intimacy inadvertently takes a back seat and the partners happen to grow apart.

If you have been thinking of ways to spice up your marriage and things to do in a relationship to keep it fun, work on your intimacy.

Sex is inevitably important in keeping a relationship alive. Sex is the only thing that makes two people more than just friends and is one of the important cornerstones of a fulfilling marriage.

But, it is not always necessary to go on a sex spree to spice up your married life.

To keep your marriage fresh and kicking, simple affectionate touches or warm hugs or cuddling up against each other can do wonders for your relationship and bring you both closer, both physically and emotionally.

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Denise Limongello Registered Psychotherapist

Denise Limongello, LMSW, is a passionate and dedicated therapist who obtained her graduate degree from Columbia University, School of Social Work. She is also a graduate of Miss Porterâ€™s School and Tulane University. Denise began her clinical career at The Renfrew Center of New York... Read more and has since then worked across all levels of care including Inpatient, Partial Hospitalization, Intensive Outpatient, and Outpatient, Private Practice settings. She is particularly dedicated to Couples Counseling, Individual Therapy, Group Therapy, and has a specialty in the treatment of Eating Disorders, including but not limited to Binge Eating Disorder and all forms of Emotional Overeating. Denise also thoroughly enjoys the treatment of all forms of addiction and grief counseling. She is an expert on Marriage and Relationships. Ms. Limongello also provides expert commentary and advice for the media and radio including Sirius XM, Redbook, Bride Magazine, eHow.com, Sheknows.com, Zliving, The Knot, and Bustle.com among others. Read less

(Denise Limongello is also listed in Best Marriage Therapists in Scarsdale)