The potential for organic healing of childhood wounds for both partners is inherent within a committed well-matched couple. They must both be able to take responsiblity for their self issues and give space for the other to confront and address their own issues. The relfection principle of what I see in you, exists in me as well applies.
One of the most important issues in couples counseling is the initial evaluation; Identifying strengths and starting from what is going right. Identifying and clarfying value differences. Defining the problematic issues and suggesting resourceful reframes. Facilitating communication. Inspiring motivation for changes. Enhancing a spirit based relationship for post traumatic growth of each individual and of the relationship IF that is what the individual members of the partnership are willing to occur.
Sometimes, a relationship may have served its purpose and it seems that further journeying will be detrimental. In cases of endings, I encourage each to act from the highest self they can express, and to be gentle with oneself in the vulnerable state of loss.
