Working with couples is one of my favorite aspects of doing therapy. Whether you are in a long term relationship, married, or just starting out, one thing remains the same. Deciding to be a couple and staying together is alot of work. Enough said!
Being in a loving, supportive relationship is very fulfilling and worth the work it requires. At times one or both partners in the relationship, can question if the grass is greener on the other side. However, we fail to realize that over time, that while it may appear that way, the truth is the grass is greener where you water it. Relationships need attention for them to grow. When we fail to do that, they can start to whither away.
A lot of couples come to counseling, with a specific problem that led them there. This can be a variety of reasons such as lack of communication, parenting, or infidelity. While discussing the problem is important, rehashing over and over is counter productive. I focus on helping a couple move forward, encouraging each partner to explore what they desire out of the relationship and helping each other achieve that outcome.
When we start to discuss solutions, and work towards sharing our needs and desires with our partner we can began to see hope again. This is where the regrowth starts to occur.
