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    3 Tips on How Not to Fall for Dating Scams

    3 Tips on How Not to Fall for Dating Scams

    Is love in the air or I’m trapped? You can think that I’m bizarre and lose the desire to go on with me from here, without even starting our safety love affair journey. But those who have been already engaged in digital trends and online dating platforms will easily identify one internet slang phrase behind these letters, which is “Love IS in the Air”. Literally, it means that love is between a couple, but recently it acquired its new tinge, meaning long-distance relationships and via online borders.

    People do not want to stay alone, so they depend on online dating or meeting platforms to find their lovers. Is it a salvation or a trap? Maybe, your hopes will be ruined, but you need to be aware that according to recent researches the number of scams exceeds successful and safe real-dates or romances. A romance scam is a kind of deception when you connect with someone of your taste and interest via dating apps, social networks or chatting platforms, but it turns out to be a fake romantic intention and even dangerous connection. Such scammers leverage your emotions to gain advantage from you and receive money.  Nevertheless, the risk is on the table, but love still wants to be in the air. Let’s consider how to use all these digital trends for your good and not to fall for datings scams.

    1. Take care of your privacy, like you do with your health

    Privacy is one of the basic and vital needs, which has to be nurtured. If you decided to give online dating a try, please always keep in mind that you should always stay sober-blooded and don’t let your surge of hormones and feelings take over.

    Do not reveal these private details: possessions, documents, addresses, earnings, names of the people you care the most or private media while chatting. Try to keep the communication light and general until you build some trust. In some cases, even personal real meetings are not the best way to reveal all the facts.

    Trust is built with time and for someone, it can be a huge intimate step forward in relationships. The person who liked you will not care that much about your external world, as what really matters here is your inner world (interests, likes, dislikes, preferences, common values).

    Whenever you feel that spotlight is directed solely at you and you’re asked lots of questions or somebody asks you for financial help, stay away from these scammers (block/ report) and do not try to teach them or emphasize. Social and dating platforms are pointing the gun towards our privacy. Don’t let this gunfire off.

    2. Reflect the spotlight and run a quick research

    One of the key points to having a successful business meeting is running a short research in advance. You know, in a personal meeting it will benefit even more. Every time there is a match you have a person’s profile with photos and some info. And how can you be sure that it is not faked and you’re not catfished or scammed? Google someone you are interested in before the real meeting. The digital world offers you multiple ways to run a private research.

    • Get one of the profile photos and run a reverse image check. You will verify the appearance and personality in such a way.
    • The one contact point which never changes is phone number. Mostly, scammers are resentful of providing details about them at all. It is already a bad sign if you still communicate in that online dating platform after 2 weeks of chatting, and nobody initiates meeting in person. But in case you were lucky to get the phone number, use it as a thread. Look up for the phone number, which can help you to pull all the details about your love affair: social profiles, media mentions, check-ins or records.  
    • Social networks will tell you more than person him/herself. You will be able to verify some basic details as well as shape social and mental profile. Pay attention to posts, shares, likes, descriptions and networking circle (friends list).

    Reflect the spotlight and run a quick research

    3. Observe and interpret

    Clear judgment is the opposite of love and passion. It looks like you can’t move in both directions, but you definitely should. When you look at a person you are able to observe facial expressions and body movements, the tone of the voice, even watch your feelings and sensations when being together. Though, it doesn’t work the same way with online dating, you also have things to pay attention at:

    • Chattings style (it has some tone, spelling, grammar, choice of words);
    • The frequency of responses;
    • Engagement in the communication (scammers do not like to provide any details about them, send pictures, meet in person or talk by phone); what is even more interesting they diverge and fire questions at you
    • Excessive compliments.

    The most frustrating thing is that they play with your feelings, trying to leverage your wishes for their own advantage. Share with your close friend some facts or messages’ descriptions to get the sober opinion. The powerful theory of communication psychology exists because of its need.

    One thought which constantly disturbs me is how dare these scammers to play with sacred and intimate feelings? When we have love wings, we feel powerful and inspired. But as we get trapped or face scamming, those wings lose feathers, become weak and afraid to show up again.


    Try not to take online dating too seriously and consider it just as an option to meet new people and develop your relationships in real life, and not virtually as you know each other better. Personally, I’m using online dating apps because with my busy schedule and dislike to crowded places and clubs it is an easy way to meet new people.

    Although  I had a couple of unsuccessful dates and was scammed, I still believe that my love affair “miracle” will happen one day. But that scamming case taught me to be careful and cautious in relationships with people.

    Valerie Malecha is one of the content managers for Spokeo – a people search platform helping users know more about the people in their lives through access to social media profiles, phone numbers, marital status, and more.
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