What Are the Different Types of Flirting: 7 Tips to Flirt the Right Way

Flirting can feel like both a mystery and an adventure—it’s that playful spark that makes conversations exciting, smiles a little brighter, and connections a bit deeper.
Sometimes it’s bold, other times it’s subtle… and often it’s simply about showing genuine interest in another person. From a teasing joke to a lingering glance, every style has its own charm and meaning.
While some people are naturally confident, others wonder if they’re “doing it right.” That’s the beauty of it—there are many types of flirting, and each one can reveal something unique about how we express affection, attraction, and warmth.
What does flirting behavior really mean?
Flirting behavior is simply a way people show attraction, interest, or connection—often through body language, tone, playful words, or small gestures. It’s not always about romance; sometimes it’s just a lighthearted way of building rapport or expressing warmth.
Example: One person may use playful teasing and jokes, while another might prefer sincere compliments and attentive listening. Both approaches fall under flirting, but they reveal different types of flirting, shaped by comfort levels and personal expression.
Please note:
There’s no single “right” way to flirt. If your style feels authentic and respectful, it’s perfectly valid. Flirting is less about perfection and more about connection, so give yourself permission to be genuine.
5 types of flirting
Flirting comes in many shapes and styles—sometimes playful, sometimes subtle, and often a mix of both. Understanding the different types of flirting can help you recognize your own approach and notice how others express interest.
A research paper published in 2015 states that different flirting styles — physical, traditional, sincere, polite, and playful — each align with distinct verbal and nonverbal behaviors.
These styles aren’t rigid rules, but they reveal patterns in how people connect. Exploring the different types of flirting makes it easier to avoid misunderstandings and build more genuine interactions.
1. Physical flirting
Physical flirting relies on body language, touch, and closeness to signal attraction. People who use this style often lean in, make longer eye contact, or gently touch an arm while laughing.
A research paper titled Body Language as a Tool for Communication states that non-verbal signals like facial expressions, gestures, posture, touch, and eye contact make up about 60-65% of all communication.
This can feel natural and confident when done with respect. It’s effective, but one must always consider the other person’s comfort and boundaries.
- Example: Lightly brushing someone’s hand while handing them a drink.
- Mistake to avoid: Ignoring signs of discomfort or pushing physical touch too quickly.
2. Playful flirting
Playful flirting is all about fun, teasing, and creating lighthearted energy. It often includes jokes, witty comebacks, or exaggerated humor to spark a connection.
While it can be charming, it doesn’t always signal serious romantic interest. It works best when both people enjoy banter equally. Use it to break the ice, not mislead.
- Example: Teasing someone about always being late in a funny, warm way.
- Mistake to avoid: Taking jokes too far or making comments that might sound offensive.
3. Sincere flirting
Sincere flirting is rooted in an authentic emotional connection. People with this style use genuine compliments, attentive listening, and open expressions of care.
Instead of flashy moves, they focus on making the other person feel truly valued. This type often leads to stronger bonds because it feels honest and kind.
- Example: Saying, “I really admire how thoughtful you are in conversations.”
- Mistake to avoid: Overloading someone with heavy emotions too early or appearing clingy.
4. Polite flirting
Polite flirting uses good manners, subtle compliments, and respectful distance. It’s gentle and considerate, showing interest without overwhelming the other person. This approach works well for people who feel shy or cautious.
While it may seem less bold, it builds trust and signals respect. The downside is that subtlety can sometimes be mistaken for disinterest.
- Example: Offering a warm smile and a sincere, low-key compliment like, “That color looks great on you.”
- Mistake to avoid: Being so subtle that the other person never realizes you’re flirting.
5. Traditional flirting
Traditional flirting follows more classic gender or role-based cues, such as men initiating conversation and women responding with interest. It often includes chivalrous gestures, like opening doors or offering help.
While times are changing, this style still appeals to those who prefer clear, traditional roles. The key is balancing respect with authenticity.
- Example: Offering to walk someone to their car after dinner as a thoughtful gesture.
- Mistake to avoid: Assuming traditional roles apply to everyone or coming across as old-fashioned in a pushy way.
7 tips to flirt in the right way
Flirting doesn’t have to feel like a guessing game—it’s really about showing interest in a way that feels natural, respectful, and fun. Whether you lean toward playful banter, sincere compliments, or subtle gestures, learning how to flirt in the right way makes all the difference.
These tips are practical, human, and rooted in what really works when connecting with someone new.
1. Keep it light and playful
Flirting should feel fun, not heavy. A lighthearted comment, a shared laugh, or a playful tease can spark a connection without overwhelming the other person. Humor is one of the most effective ways to create comfort and warmth. Just remember—kindness should always sit underneath the playfulness.
- Why it works: Playful energy lowers tension and makes conversations feel easy and enjoyable.
2. Use eye contact wisely
Eye contact is one of the most powerful nonverbal signals. Looking into someone’s eyes shows confidence and genuine interest, but balance matters. Too much staring feels intense, while avoiding it completely feels distant. The right mix creates trust and a sense of closeness without pressure.
- Why it works: Eye contact builds intimacy and helps the other person feel seen and valued.
3. Listen more than you talk
Good flirting isn’t just about clever lines—it’s about showing that you’re truly paying attention. Listening carefully, asking thoughtful questions, and remembering little details communicates care. When someone feels heard, it deepens the connection and makes your flirting feel meaningful instead of superficial.
- Why it works: Active listening proves you value the person beyond surface-level attraction.
4. Match their energy
Everyone flirts differently—some are bold, while others are more reserved. Adjusting to the other person’s pace shows emotional awareness and respect. If they’re joking around, meet them halfway. If they’re more thoughtful, respond with sincerity. Matching their vibe keeps the interaction balanced and comfortable.
- Why it works: People feel safer and more connected when their energy is mirrored.
5. Use compliments with care
A genuine compliment can make someone feel seen and appreciated, but it has to be authentic. Instead of over-the-top flattery, focus on something specific—like their laugh, their outfit, or their perspective. Done right, compliments feel warm instead of forced.
- Why it works: Honest compliments boost confidence and create positive feelings associated with you.
6. Respect personal space
Physical closeness can be powerful, but it should always be comfortable for both people. Pay attention to how they respond when you lean in or touch their arm. If they seem uneasy, give them space. Respectful flirting always feels safe, not pushy.
- Why it works: Respecting boundaries shows emotional intelligence and creates trust.
Watch this TED Talk by Sarri Gilman, psychotherapist, who shares how saying “yes” and “no” clearly—setting good boundaries—can reduce stress, improve relationships, and empower your life.
7. Be yourself—genuinely
The most important tip is to be authentic. Pretending to be overly charming or trying too hard usually backfires. When you let your natural style shine—whether playful, sincere, or polite—you’re more likely to attract someone who appreciates the real you. This ties back to the different types of flirting we all use naturally.
- Why it works: Authenticity creates genuine connection and builds relationships that last.
How do you know if your flirting is being received well?
Flirting can feel exciting, but it also comes with a little uncertainty—are they interested, or just being polite?
The good news is that people often give clear signals when they’re enjoying the interaction. Since there are different types of flirting, knowing how your style is received helps you adjust naturally and respectfully.
- They mirror your energy: If someone laughs when you laugh, leans in when you do, or matches your playful tone, it’s a strong sign they’re engaged and comfortable.
- They keep the conversation going: When the other person asks you questions, adds to your jokes, or offers personal details, it shows genuine interest in building a connection.
- They use open body language: Smiles, relaxed posture, and leaning toward you usually mean they’re receptive. Closed arms or looking away may signal discomfort.
- They make eye contact often: Frequent, warm eye contact suggests attraction and trust, especially when paired with a smile or light touch.
- They respond quickly and positively: Whether in person or online, quick and enthusiastic replies indicate that your style—among the many types of flirting—is being welcomed.
Please note:
While it’s exciting to notice these signs, it’s also important not to overanalyze or overdo your flirting. Keep it natural, respectful, and balanced—connection should feel easy, not forced.
FAQ
Flirting often brings up lots of questions—what feels right, what doesn’t, and how to keep it natural. Here are some quick, clear answers to common concerns.
-
Can flirting be harmless?
Yes, flirting can be completely harmless when done respectfully. It’s often a playful way to connect, but intentions should always be clear and considerate.
-
How do I know if I’m over-flirting?
If your jokes, compliments, or attention feel constant or forced, it may be too much. Watch for signs of discomfort—like short replies or lack of engagement.
-
Is digital flirting different from face-to-face flirting?
Yes, digital flirting relies on emojis, texts, or playful messages, while in-person flirting uses body language and tone. Both work, but balance and respect are key in either space.
The art of connection
Flirting is less about perfect lines and more about genuine connection. Whether through playful jokes, sincere compliments, or subtle gestures, it’s a way of showing interest and building trust.
By understanding the different styles and noticing how they’re received, you can flirt in a way that feels natural and respectful.
Remember, the goal isn’t to impress—it’s to connect authentically. When you stay true to yourself, respect boundaries, and keep things light, flirting becomes less of a challenge and more of a meaningful experience.
Write your tip or submit a video tip
All tips are reviewed before the publishing.
Share this article on
Want to have a happier, healthier marriage?
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.
Related Quizzes
Ask your question related to this topic & get the support you deserve from experts.