Am I abusive to my partner? Since this question has arisen, either your partner has accused you of doing so, or you seem to be having doubts about your behavior towards them. We all have certain behavioral patterns.
They may seem normal to us, but in reality, some of those behavioral patterns could be hurtful. If you are concerned with how you treat your partner and want to know if you are crossing the line, take this short ‘Am I Abusive To My Partner quiz’ to find out!
1. Do you believe your partner is afraid of you or the things you will do?
A. Yes
B. No
C. Sometimes
2. Do you call your partner names, degrade them, or say things to hurt them on purpose because you know it will upset them?
A. Yes, plenty of times
B. No
C. Only once or twice
3. Has your partner or someone else in your life accused you of being abusive to your partner?
A. Yes, plenty of times
B. No
C. Only once or twice
4. Have any of your past partners or someone else in your life accused you of being abusive in past relationships?
A. Yes, plenty of times
B. Only once or twice
C. No
5. Have you ever threatened bodily harm to your partner or threatened to kill them?
A. Yes, plenty of times
B. No
C. Only once or twice
6. Have you ever been physical with your partner, i.e., hit, punch, slap, push, choke, pull their hair, etc.?
A. Yes, plenty of times
B. No
C. Only once or twice
7. If your partner is not doing what you want them to do or is somewhere you don’t want them to be, do you obsessively text and call them until they leave or do what you are asking?
A. Yes, plenty of times
B. No
C. Only once or twice
8. Are you hyper-critical of your partner?
A. Sometimes
B. No
C. Yes
9. Do you behave differently in public than you do when you are alone with your partner, saving your "best behavior" for others?
A. Sometimes
B. No
C. Yes
10. Do you blame your partner when things don't work out the way you envisioned or hoped?
A. Sometimes
B. No
C. Yes
11. Do you belittle or berate your partner?
A. Sometimes
B. No
C. Yes
12. Do you feel your partner can’t do anything right?
A. Sometimes
B. No
C. Yes
13. Have you ever destroyed things belonging to your partner as a way to get back at them for doing something you didn’t like?
A. Yes, plenty of times
B. No
C. Only once or twice
14. Do you believe you should know everyone your partner talks to, hangs out with, everywhere they go, everything they are doing, etc., all of the time?
A. Yes
B. No
C. Sometimes
15. Do you believe your partner should be yelled at, criticized, or harmed if they are acting in a way that upsets you?
A. Yes
B. No
C. Sometimes
