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  • Rycroft asked a question on Aug 27, 2015
    Should I look for a marriage counseling retreat?
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    How will marriage counseling techniques help in me in future?
    Going for marriage counseling can be compared to going on a diet. If your only goal in going on a diet is to lose a lot of weight very quickly and then go back to your old way of eating, you may lose that weight initially, but it will all come back again when you resume your old habits. When your goal is to learn a healthier, better way of living, with a long term goal in mind, then you will have much more effective and satisfactory results. It’s the same with marriage counseling; you aim to learn over time a new way of living, a new way of relating to your spouse which is marked by respect, intimacy and true love which never fails.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    Can you help me save my marriage after having an affair?
    The fact that you have had an affair is probably a clear indicator that you and your spouse need help. Please find a reputable marriage counselor or go to your pastor for help. If you are truly repentant and your spouse is willing to forgive you, then there is great hope for your marriage to be even better than it ever was. But you cannot work it out alone with your spouse. You need a firm accountability structure and you need caring and professional people who will walk you through this difficult time and beyond. Be honest, humble and willing to learn and change your ways – then you can look forward to your future with hope and peace.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    What is the best way to get pregnant?
    The best way to get pregnant is when you and your spouse have been happily married for some time and now you both feel ready to start a family. It is best if you are fully aware of the huge responsibility involved in having a child and are committed to spending the time effort and money that it will take to raise the precious little one that will be entrusted into your care. If you are both well and healthy, with no underlying reproductive problems, and you are not taking any contraceptive measures, then you will probably get pregnant in due course if you are making love often and regularly.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    When should a christian couple seek counseling?
    A Christian couple should seek counseling whenever they feel that their marriage is not the way it should be and that they need help to overcome particular issues in their relationship. Often Christians have the false belief that they should be able to trust God to deal with all their troubles and that if they seek counseling it is somehow an indication of a lack of faith or a failure to trust God. This is so untrue and has kept many couples struggling alone for years. The truth is that God wants His people to help each other with His guidance and truth.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    Looking for unique anniversary gift ideas. Please suggest.
    Anniversary gifts can be as unique as the individuals who give or receive them. The best gifts are those which have some personal significance, or which evoke a positive emotion because they trigger happy memories of some shared experience. For example, if you spent your honeymoon in Mauritius, then an anniversary gift with a Mauritian theme would be a beautiful reminder of that special time. Perhaps you could also follow up the gift with a lovely meal at a Mauritian Restaurant. The number of years is also significant, for example if it is the fifth anniversary, then you could arrange for five different people to come and deliver a message and small gift to your beloved at different times throughout the day.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    Looking for an affordable marriage counseling agency. Please suggest.
    When you are looking for an affordable marriage counseling agency, you would need to research thoroughly and find out what is available in the area or region in which you live. Often you will find a Christian or church-based service which is willing to be flexible with their charges, depending on your income and the funds that you have available. It is good to ask around and hear from your friends or others you know who have received help, whether they would recommend certain agencies or not. The cost should not be something which prevents you from getting the help you need. So don’t stop looking, asking and searching until you find help – there is help for you.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    How should I find a reliable marriage counselor?
    One way to know whether a marriage counselor is reliable or not would be to hear the stories and testimonies of the people who have been counseled, and to see whether or not their lives have changed for the better as a result of the counseling they have received. If you do not have access to such information, you would need to do some research of your own and check out the qualifications of the counselor and how long they have been providing marriage counseling. Probably the best way to find a reliable marriage counselor is through a referral from somebody you trust such as your pastor or your doctor.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    How do I get pregnant after taking strict precautions?
    If you have been taking strict contraceptive precautions for some time, then it is probably best to go for a checkup with your doctor or gynecologist to make sure that all is well with your reproductive system. Your doctor may suggest a course of vitamins or supplements to boost your body’s well being and health, thus improving your chances of getting pregnant as soon as possible. It is important to give your body time to adjust to the hormonal changes. Don’t be impatient to get pregnant. Just relax and enjoy your love life, and look forward and prepare yourself mentally and emotionally for the happy news when you will get pregnant, all in good time.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    What are the pre marriage counseling questions that every couple should know?
    Before getting married every couple needs to communicate extensively and openly with each other, sharing their expectations for their relationship on a wide range of topics. Five of the essential areas that would need to be covered are as follows: Relationship Goals and Personal Habits; Why are we getting married? What do we as a couple want out of life? Do you think faith and spirituality are important in a marriage? Finances; Are you a saver or spender when it comes to money? Do you want to have a budget? Do you consider going to the movies and having a vacation every year a necessity or a luxury? Family; Do we want to have children? What was your childhood like? How much time will we spend with our in-laws? Sex and Intimacy; What are your expectations of our sexual relationship? What is your love language? What are your expectations about how we will spend our free time? Conflict and Communication; How will we make decisions together? Are we both willing to face into difficult areas or do we try to avoid conflict? Are we both willing to work on our communication skills and to share intimately with each other?
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    Need some tips on getting pregnant and parenting as well.
    Once you decide you would like to get pregnant, and you are not taking any contraceptives, you would need to have intercourse during the six days of your cycle when it is possible to fall pregnant. These include the five days prior to ovulation and twenty-four hours after ovulation. If you are not exactly sure when ovulation takes place, making love every second day, or at least three times a week is advisable. It is important to relax and not feel stressed or pressured to get pregnant as this can diminish your chances. With regard to parenting, it is good to read recommended parenting books. You could also ask older people you admire and regard as successful parents, what they have learnt and what they would advise about parenting.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    Need some marriage counseling tips that can put my disturbed marriage on track.
    The fact that you know your marriage is disturbed and you are seeking to get on track is very positive and means that you are facing in the right direction. You need to be willing to take a long-term view and realize that there are no quick-fix tips when it comes to relationships, especially marriage. It requires much patience and perseverance. The more you and your spouse can each talk openly about what is disturbing you, the better. Learn to ask open ended questions and then listen very carefully to the answers – listen to what is NOT said, as well as what is said. Learn to admit when you are wrong and to ask for forgiveness.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    Do books on marriage relate to real life marriage issues? Can you recommend some books to read?
    Usually books on marriage will relate to real life issues such as sex and intimacy, dealing with finances, conflict resolution and communication issues. Often marriage books will include helpful case studies or stories about real couples, giving details on their situations and how they have been able to overcome their challenges. Some helpful books on marriage are the following: Loving Solutions by Gary Chapman; Passage to Intimacy : Key Concepts and Skills from the Pairs Program Which Has Helped Thousands of Couples Rekindle Their Love, by Lori H. Gordon and Jon Frandsen; Fighting for Your Marriage: Positive Steps for Preventing Divorce and Preserving a Lasting Love by Howard J. Markman, Scott M. Stanley, Susan L. Blumberg.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    Having a baby in a troubled marriage is a wrong decision?
    If you are hoping that having a baby is going to resolve the trouble in your marriage and bring you closer together as a couple, you may be right, but more likely you will be disappointed. Having a baby, even in a healthy and functional marriage, brings a huge amount of stress and challenges, as well as much joy. The troubles of your marriage may be temporarily put on hold while you both take care of the new baby, enduring sleepless nights and colic together. However, unless the underlying issues are dealt with they will resurface sooner or later. For the sake of your child, rather address the trouble in your marriage before bringing an innocent baby into the conflict zone.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    What is couple therapy retreats?
    A couples therapy retreat is an opportunity for a couple to take time out from their busy schedule, away from the hustle and bustle of everyday life. These retreats are usually for a period of up to four days or over a weekend, and often take place in a tranquil venue. Counselors interact with couples both in private sessions or small group sessions, covering issues such as trust, resentment and communication. Couples learn how to improve their communication skills and how to be more forgiving and to stop playing the blame game which is so destructive to a relationship. Retreats like this are often helpful for couples to learn to be more intimate, to find their true goals and to strengthen their friendship.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    Please suggest me some experienced relationship counselors.
    There are many experienced relationship counselors who have a good reputation and have been instrumental in helping many couples to get their marriage back on track. Depending on the location where you live, you would need to research the counselors who are available in your area, or in the radius of where you would be able to travel if necessary. It is good to hear the reports or testimonies of couples who have been counseled, so that you can gauge whether that is what you are looking for or not. You can explore your options by looking in your local directory or researching online, as well as calling your local churches, hospitals or clinics that would be able to recommend experienced relationship counselors.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    What are the most unexpected ways of saving a marriage?
    The most unexpected ways of saving a marriage are probably the very small ways which can make the biggest difference. Often we are looking for some big flash of lightning, but actually all that is needed is to light one little candle for the darkness to dissipate. These small things would include finding one way every day to tell your spouse why they are special to you and what you appreciate about them – basically being thankful instead of focusing on the negatives. Also to spend time together every day, even if it is just ten minutes, really making eye contact and connecting in a conversation in which you really want to know how the other is doing, and you listen carefully to their response.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    What is the most appropriate age to have a baby?
    The most appropriate age to have a baby is when both husband and wife feel ready to embark on the adventure of parenthood. Physically, a woman’s body is usually at her prime in the late teens and twenties, and generally speaking it is best to have your babies while you are young. That way you are still fairly young when they are grown up and hopefully able to enjoy your grandchildren at a younger age too. Most people believe it is not advisable to have a baby after the age of forty, however there are always exceptions. Ultimately it is a decision that each couple needs to make for themselves.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    What are the best wedding gifts for the groom?
    The best wedding gifts for the groom would depend on his individual personality and his circumstances. Sometimes giving a cash gift would be the most useful especially with all the added expenses surrounding the wedding day. Or if you have a close relationship with the groom, perhaps something more personal which would reflect shared memories and suit his preferences. For example, if the groom enjoys reading you might like to give him a special book or DVD on the husband’s role in marriage. If you know his tastes in music, you could give him a CD of one of his favorite artists.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    Why should Christians seek premarital counseling?
    Christians should seek premarital counseling for the same reasons as any other engaged couples should. Marriage is a huge adjustment and probably one of the most significant and life-changing events in a person’s life. Just as with any other big event, such as moving house or changing careers, you would invest much time and effort in planning and preparation, in order to make the transition as effective and fruitful as possible. For a Christian, marriage is a lifetime commitment, one which requires counting the cost and being completely sure before making a promise before God and the witnesses of this serious marriage covenant.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    Does counseling for couples help them before marriage?
    Counseling for couples before marriage is an excellent way of preparing for the most important relationship of your life. The more you can know about your partner before you get married, the more prepared you will be for the inevitable adjustment which the step of marriage will entail. When both partners are willing to be open and honest in front of a counselor, this will bring an element of accountability and humility which is a good foundation for the marriage. As issues are discussed openly, the couple will learn how to improve their communication skills, as well as their conflict resolution skills, which will stand them in good stead throughout their marriage.
  • Rycroft answered a question on Sep 01, 2015
    I am trying to get pregnant, but failed. Can you tell me best chance to concieve?
    It is great that you are wanting to get pregnant and it is understandable that you feel frustrated when you have not yet conceived. Perhaps a visit to your doctor or gynecologist would be beneficial as he can reassure you that you do not have any untreated infections or other ailments which may prevent you falling pregnant. He could also suggest a good prenatal vitamin tonic for you. You may also want to use an ovulation prediction kit or a fertility monitor which could help you to know when your most fertile days would be so you can plan to make love especially on those days as much as possible.