- Halbert asked
- Halbert answered Are we having healthy conflict in our marriage and continually fighting for the health of our marriage, even if some conversations are difficult? Being willing to work through things together rather than sweeping issues under the rug is a good indicator of a healthy marriage.
- Halbert answered Marriage gifts that totally rock ones world are really dependent on the bride herself. To find the perfect gift for the bride find the person that really knows her the best if you don’t and dig deep or get her to dig deep and think about her ultimately favorite things in life. What does she like to do the most or collect? What is your favorite color? What is her favorite music? Does she prefer intimate times with those she loves or going out to eat most? Does she enjoy sports or dancing more? Figure out what is most important and special to her and then discover the best gift.
- Halbert answered How can relationship compatibility not be important? It is key to a successful relationship. You don’t have to be totally similar or alike in many ways even, but you do have to be compatible even if the ways you are opposite and different complement each other. It is important because relationships take work and to be able to work together as a team in a relationship you have to be compatible with one another. You have to be able to at least solve problems and come up with solutions together, being able to agree on a path to get there.
- Halbert answered After divorce it can take quite some time to feel whole again. If you gave a lot into your marriage and sacrificed parts of yourself it can especially cause some challenges to get back on track. It is possible though. It can help to find something bigger than yourself to give yourself to through time and energy. Find other people in your life that you can build true and honest relationships with or if you already have them build on them and let them flourish. Surround yourself with those that are positive and fill you up with love.
- Halbert answered Some ways to know if your partner is flirting is the way she looks and acts around the person. Most often her body language will give an indication. How is she acting with you? Is she giving you the same full attention as she usually does or is she distant and disconnected? Will she sit next to the person given the opportunity? Is she starting up a conversation with someone else and wanting to continue it? When she’s talking to the person, try to interrupt and depending on how she responds will determine one way or the other. If she is happy to get up and talk with you, then you’re probably okay. If she’s hesitant it’s more of a question.
- Halbert answered It is possible, by being very subtle in your technique. Smile and show your interest but in a very low key way. The best way to win someone’s interest is to get and hold their attention by demonstrating your sincere desire in getting to know who they really are. The way to truly do this is to ask a good lead in open-ended question that will get them talking about who they are. From there gradually get deeper with the questions, being sure to keep periodic and steady eye contact throughout the conversation. Then toward the end gently touch her or his hand then let go. If you show genuine sincere interest in someone else it can be flirting.
- Halbert answered Don’t try too hard. Be yourself and natural. Give undivided attention when you’re talking and provide encouraging and supporting words. Gently touch his or her hand while talking to let her know you’re interested and be sure to make eye contact, but without staring of course. Don’t be too overbearing or pushy in your words or actions, but stay laid back and relaxed. Show that you are enjoying her or his company and interest by asking lots of questions getting her or him to do most of the talking. If you are out together or even at a gathering and there is music, ask her or him to dance.
- Halbert answered Flirting can be a lot of fun and an exciting adventure. Be able to make the person feel special and desired, but in a tactful and not distasteful way. Be confident and courageous, but not too forward to push the other back. Touch, but in a non-threatening friendly way with very gradual escalation without lingering. Provide and loving and thoughtful complement without shown expectation. Use a nickname to catch his or her attention. Be natural and show true interest in getting to know him or her. Most importantly be yourself and don’t try too hard or it may go the opposite direction.
- Halbert answered Depression counseling techniques are ones used to help someone deal with and work through their feelings and state of depression. These can include techniques from usually one or more of three different therapies most used for those who are depressed. The three techniques are Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Psychodynamic Therapy, and Interpersonal Therapy. These are all effective treatment modalities to use. Some of the techniques may include help in developing goals and changing behaviors;not ruminating by introducing ways to distract such as meditation, visualization, or redirection; focusing on the present; working through past traumatic experiences; or reaching out and connecting deeper to others.
- Halbert answered Some people have this idea in their heads that to be a good communicator you just need to hear what someone says and say “okay” and share what you think. It is truly a lot more that is needed in a relationship for it to be effective. You need patience, understanding, and the ability to put your own thoughts, judgments, and feelings aside to really listen to your partner and give them a chance to share. You also need to be open and honest in conversation. Have real conversations that are full of vulnerability and humility. Let your partner start sharing by you asking relevant questions to get him or her to start talking.
- Halbert answered It is definitely possible to save your marriage after cheating occurs, but you need something greater than yourselves to have a chance for help. You can’t have an idealistic attitude that you can do it alone or just by saying I’m sorry. The person cheating needs to completely change and build a new solid conviction. He or she needs to do whatever it takes to regain trust in the relationship. The person that was cheated on needs to have a true heart and needs to be willing to go through it with their partner and really dig deep to forgive completely and fully.
- Halbert answered It’s hard to say without knowing the relationship how well couples counseling works for a particular couple. Couples counseling is known to work for many couples though. There are many proven techniques within couples counseling that help partners in grow in their relationship through communication and exploring new ways to relate and connect. It can be very beneficial for couples who are having trouble communicating and working through the problems they are having in their relationship. Finding a great compatible therapist as a couple is key though. It has to be someone that the two will trust fully in open and honest communication. The couple also has to be willing to work and change.
- Halbert answered There are many great and reliable family and marriage therapists in just about every larger community. The best way to find one is to ask for a solid recommendation from friends or family members that you trust who have gone to see one in your area. Other ways to find one are to look online at sites such as psychcentral.com or goodtherapy.org and search for one near you. You can also look up therapists on sites of various psychological associations such as the American Counseling Association, American Psychological Association, or Counseling Psychology on the American Board of Professional Psychology site.
- Halbert answered If you trust the counselor and really give it your all, following through with everything that is taught you they can really help your relationship. If there is not intimacy and true connection though in your relationship then it may help but only temporarily. There are many different counseling techniques to be used for couples and mostly they will help you to reach deeper into your relationship with each other and try things you haven’t before to get new ways of communicating and relating flowing. This can only help in a relationship and hopefully at least help ignite a fire.
- Halbert answered A break up can be the best idea depending on the relationship. Explore and dig deep to discover if that is what you both truly want and need. Sometimes the relationship just requires some more attention and time given to it with an undivided heart. But, it can also be a good idea to end the relationship sometimes if it is not a compatible one or you can’t reach a place within it to have real and honest conversations. If there is anything blocking you from doing this with each other then it may be time to take a break. You will have a fresh start and yes get to reflect, learn, and move ahead.
- Halbert answered There is no simple or fast way that is going to provide a quick save to a marriage necessarily but the best way to do it in the least amount of time possible is to completely put your own agenda aside. Do this in all of your interactions with your spouse and by providing unconditional, positive, loving, caring, understanding, patient, and nonjudgmental attention and support. Truly listen to your spouse and provide her or him with the space to really express whatever it is she or he is needing from you and the relationship to be able to move forward. Then be willing to change and start changing immediately.
- Halbert answered Start by asking your partner what is missing and/or needing in your relationship. This will help you to recognize the areas that need extra attention in support. If you are the one that is missing something or needing something more then you also need to be open and honest about those things with your partner and let the communication begin. A good idea is to establish at least a weekly, if not daily time that you two get a chance to really connect through sharing with one another and really talking through things and listening to one another without judgment.
- Halbert answered The first step in the process of dealing with relationships is to identify the key issue. Is it a problem in communication, in how much time you spend together, in the kind of attention you give to your partner, in how you handle circumstances like finances or kids, or is it a problem of just not having compatible interests or having fun together? Figure out what is at the root of your problems and start tackling the issue little by little. It likely will take breaking it down into pieces to truly figure it out and work through all the layers, but you can have success with time and patience.
- Halbert answered The best way to get meaningful advice about your relationship is to ask the people closest to the two of you that really know each of you for help. Your closest friends know you the best. Or, if you’re closest friends aren’t friends to both of you together, bring one friend in for each of you but get an outside perspective from people who do know you. Or another option is to see a couples counselor or to both talk to people that you completely trust. The way to do this to get the most meaningful advice no matter what the scenario though is to be completely open and honest when seeking the help.
- Halbert answered Some effective ways to save a marriage are to dig deep to find the core cause, figure out the ways you aren’t communicating effectively, make sure you are still making time to have fun together and rekindle your love through common interests, and really take the time and make the effort to truly listen to your partner with unconditional regard, attention, and nonjudgment. Be sure to ask, with your full heart behind it, what she or he is truly needing from you right now and what is missing. Then work to fill those needs. It can take real desire for an action of change.
- Halbert answered Everyday issues in a marriage are usually caused by communication issues at the root. For everyday issues to go well excellent, consistent communication is absolutely key. Break down the common problems you are running into and tackle them one by one. Create systems that work for the both of you, not just one. Make sure that you are both heard in your thoughts and ideas from the other one. Designate a weekly time, if not daily to sit down and run through all the details of your day to day lives that need to be worked and talked through. If you need additional help, ask for it from a set of good friends.
- Halbert answered There are many different websites you can search for to get online relationship help tips, or you can ask someone who has gone through the experience before. It is a rather common form of relationship these days. If you ask around you probably can find a handful of people that have been through it even though it may not seem like the case. Some of the other ways you can get online relationship help is asking your friends for help or someone else you trust. A relationship is a relationship and because it is online doesn’t mean it necessarily needs a particularly different kind of help than any other.
- Halbert answered Wedding vows are words a couple shares with each other at the time of marriage their marriage ceremony. These words are supposed to symbolize commitment with promises to one another to keep with each other for the rest of their lives. Wedding vows may be used that are standard or traditional in nature that are already written for the couple, or they can be written by the couple together or independently from one another, or a couple could ask someone else to write them for them. It is up to the couple getting married to decide what wedding vows to use during their marriage ceremony.
- Halbert answered Horoscope compatibility is how well two people will match up or get along based on when they were born which determines their astrological sign. A horoscope represents your astrological sign and its description of your traits in your personality, etc. Astrology divides human traits in to groups and then horoscope or astrological compatibility works by comparing your traits with that of another person to determine how well the traits match up. It is a complex field and there are so many things that can play into ones astrological chart if you really go into depth with it. That all being said, each person is unique and if you believe that you’re horoscope truly defines who you are, it could possibly work well for you.
- Halbert answered Getting help to save a marriage that is in jeopardy is crucial. The first step is to dig deep to the true underlying cause of what is leading to the point of divorce and discuss it with each other without judgment, without conditions, or expectations. You may need help to do this and this is where great friends of the two of you can come in, or a marriage counselor. I can help by starting to guide you in the right direction. One of the root causes of failed marriages is a deep rooted issue in communication between the two people.
- Halbert answered To propose you can go with a low key common way with dinner, wine, and scrumptious dessert or you can go the route of doing something completely out of the box. This could be something like leaving just enough cereal in the bottom of her favorite cereal box with the ring in it, leave it hanging from the mirror in her car to see when she gets in it in the morning, putting it around the bottom of her toothbrush taped in place, or wearing the ring around your neck on a chain waiting till she figures it out. There are so many creative ways to propose or it can be a simple gesture of your love for her that is special and meaningful to just the two of you.
- Halbert answered Is romantic love different than other love? Romantic love can mean different things depending on the giver and receiver. Romantic love though is about intimacy, about creating close and intimate times together to really connect. It could mean having at least a romantic time set aside at least once a week to spend in affection, in truly getting to know one another, and have deep conversation. Romantic love cannot be separated from connection and close intimacy through words, actions, acts of service, or just holding each other embracing who the other truly is without judgment and with unconditional regard and support.
- Halbert answered To be loving means to put your partner above yourself. A couple tips to bring love into the relationship include to provide your partner with the opportunity to share themselves- including their hopes, dreams, desires, inner most fears, thoughts, and joys, figure out your partners love language or two and use those. Love languages can include acts of services, words of affirmation, affection/physical touch, gifts, quality time, or active listening. Pay attention to the details of who your partner is and show sincere interest to go deeper into love.
- Halbert answered Asking marriage counseling questions can definitely help a relationship. They are designed to help a couple to dig deep in relation to one another and their feelings and thoughts about themselves, each other, and the two of them together as a unit. Having questions to draw each other out and help guide a conversation are ideal in a relationship when you are stuck in a marriage rut. Sometimes just a twist in how you already tend to do things in your marriage can change things up and help them to flow again. True conversations can hopefully start at this point.
- Halbert answered Some engagement proposal ideas include singing her favorite song to her and in the middle switch up some words with a proposal; set up her favorite dinner, put on a romantic song, ask her to slow dance, and then get down on one knee; take her on a quiet gandala ride on a lake and ask her in the middle of it; tell her you want to look through all of your pictures together and have the ring taped on the back of her favorite one of the two of you; or tell her you want her to see something on your Facebook page and have it typed out on your status.
- Halbert answered If your wife doesn’t want to save your marriage it must be pretty miserable for her. It may not seem that way outwardly, but inwardly she must be really struggling hard. The best thing to do is do everything you can to make sure that you have given her the space to let all of her thoughts and feelings out that she needs to. Acknowledge her thoughts and feelings in response, but don’t respond with your own thoughts and feelings until she is completely done and you have shown her that you love all the ins and outs of her and want to do what it takes to keep your marriage together.
- Halbert answered One of the most important things to do to keep a healthy relationship is to keep lines of communication open. Never put your partner in the corner in which he or she cannot get out of because you shut him or her down from fully communicating whatever is needed to come out. Also, stay connected to your partner. Make sure you have a good balance of serious life and relationship talks, but that you also have fun and relaxing times together, and especially times of laughter and true joy. Check in with each other nightly by really connecting and sharing about your thoughts and feelings throughout the day that you each had.
- Halbert answered Get input! If your marriage is to the point of an almost divorce, get help and get it fast. Either go to a marriage counselor together or find a trusted couple for the both of you that you can be completely open with. Then without filters, but with sincere and in-depth conversation start hashing things out. Let down the walls and not only communicate vulnerably yourself, but definitely give your partner the space to do the same without judgment and with genuine care and love written all over your face and through your body language. Tell your partner how much you love her or him.