how do i explain that threatening to break up is abusive and not a good way to force me to do what they want
spouse threatens to break up over minor things when they dont get their way there are children involved so this is really torture for me to have them tell methat we are breaking up over some minor thing eg toys werent packed up in toy room before they came home.
it has destroyed love trust stability.
how do i tell them how abusive and damaging this method is that they threaten to break up in order to get their way.
they dont really break up, they just torture me thinking we are breaking up to manipulate me to do what they want.
You should talk to your spouse about this and tell them that this is unacceptable behavior. Hopefully, your spouse will have some reason for this. You must make it clear that if there is something that needs to be put across, threatening to break up is not the way to go about it. You may consider taking therapy for this.