confused about marriage and the partner
I am a female, age 29.
I am divorcee and I got divorced at the age of 23 and my wedding life lasted only for 2 months and he didn't like to have sex with me and found that he is a gay.
After getting divorce for I have been studying and got a job and I was successful in my life and carrer.
For past one year I am not happy.
I feel confused, upset, pysically and mentally unhappy.
The resaon is, I planned to get into second marriage and I met a person and he is also a divorcee.
Initially I was not at all interested in him but he kept on telling me that I love you I want to be with me throughout my life and I will take care of you and carrer.
He started to speak polietly for 2 days and from the 3rd day he is speaking things that are irrelavant to the marriage and he didn't give a chance for me to speak in between.
But he said I love you.
After speaking with him for 1 month, I know that he is confuisng me but days had gone and even I thought he is in love with me so, I should not miss him and we got engaged.
I know that he is not perfect but the only reason why I accepted him is he says he loves me a lot.
We got engaged and within 10 days we had to discuss about marriage and I had a doubt on him that he is hiding and we cancelled the marriage and said we both can get separated.
After the separation we are still in touch.
Now I lost my job, I am not feeling good, he is telling me that he loves me a lot but sometimes, he is testing me to check if I am a good girl and abuses me verbally and finally physically.
When I ask him about it, he says that he is getting tensed when I say we are incompatible or I dont say that I love him.
He thinks he is the best person in this world with all the traits.
He is not at all allowing me to speak.
He is so talkative and he is not listening to me and finally says I know about you and I want you.
He says, he is the only person who can understand me.
What should I do now, I have lost everything now my carrer, abused and I am crying now.
I usually cry when we both meet up.
Hi, It seems like this guy is kind of strange and you don't understand him the way one should if one has to get married to the guy. I would advise you to analyze the situation critically, spend some time thinking about your happiness. Try to recognize your desires and then act on it. It is not easy, but those who can identify their desires of life are the ones who lead a happy life. So, take your time and choose for yourself. If for instance, you decide to give this guy a chance, be honest and just state your opinions and views about the relationship you guys have, about your desires and what you want next. Being honest is the penultimate path that leads to satisfaction and self-consciousness. Hope you got what you were looking for, Good Luck!