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Marriage advice

I've been married 9yrs, it was the perfect love the 2yrs we dated. Off and on for the past 9yrs she's gotten to where she want's nothing to do with me except my paycheck and help around the house. She refuses to go to counseling or discuss our issues with family/friends. Everytime I try to talk about us she comes up with new excuses and says I've gone off the deep end that I need help. I don't think she's having an affair, and I know she knows the key elements needed for a successful marriage, she just simply refuses to allow any of them between us. I'm a Christian so I want to believe we're meant to be and there's still hope but I'm running out of ideas.

1 Answer

ted1234 said on
9 years is a long time and marriages sometimes lose spark over the years. I think there is hope for your relationship. The reason your wife is refusing to go counseling, refusing to speak to family and friends about your problems is, because she has become very used to the monotonous married life routine. Though you see the problem here (that your relationship is losing excitement and intimacy) but she does not. She probably thinks that this is what happens in the later years of  a relationship and both of you can do nothing about it.
If talking to her about it is not  working out for you, then you should may be take her out for dinner, plan a weekend getaway, make changes in your bedroom regime, buy her a special gift.  All these things will get her closer to you and will make her open up to you more.
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