How do I deal with a verbally abusive husband?
I have been with my husband for 3 years now. We are both 23 and met first in high school. We have a one year old baby. I stay with the baby at home and he works to pay rent. If my husband asks me somthing, for example "Do you know where are the keys?", I say "Are they not over there?". He gets pissed off with my reply and say "Why can't you fucking answer the damn question I asked if you know the answer? Where it's a yes or no answer, you never directly answer my fucking questions!". Now, if I ask him to do something like "Take out the trash" and it has been three hours since I asked but he still has not done it. If I ask him again for the same thing, he will get pissed off and say "Yes, Cathy! I will take out the fucking trash. Why are you nagging and bitching at me? This is why I don't want to come home after work and rather go fishing because your so negative.". During our fights, he calls me a stupid bitch, ugly, and asshole. This has been happening for three years but has gradually become worse. I have no idea how to handle him because he is not always like this. He can be sweet, bring me flowers, make dinner, buy me wine, etc. He gets mad over the smallest things and goes off on me. Now, I have no idea how to deal with this problem.
Graham said on
I think the problem you are facing is very common with newly married couples. It is easy to be in love with each other living separately but when two people start living together, such problems, like temper tanturms, are bound to happen. What is important here is the perseverance to keep loving each other and adjusting in real life for the partner. I think you need to discuss these issues with your partner when he is willing to talk. You should express your expectations from him. You will be surprised to see how he is observing and looking at things. He might come up with another set of issues you might have totally ignored.