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"Marital counseling had not effect the first time. Should I call it quits with my wife?"

Answers (4)

DAVIS54 said on
Marriage counseling isn’t like a pill that you take and it either works or it doesn’t. With counseling, you can be sure you’ll only get out of it what you put into it. If marriage counseling had no effect, the questions you should be asking are:
• How seriously did I take the work of repairing our relationship?
• Did I honestly try to do the assignments that were given to us by our counselor?
• Did I challenge myself to do things differently at home?
• Were we seeing a counselor that both of us could relate to and open up with?
• How long did we try counseling?
lifewanderer said on
Yes, as Davis54 mentioned, marital counselling isn't a miracle for marriages. Well, it can be, but only if both of you are willing to make the necessary sacrifices and compromises together. Usually one session of counselling isn't enough. In that first session, you are still getting to know the counsellor, and chances are both of you are putting on a facade. You should go through a few more sessions of counselling to reap its benefits.
yosemitefaerie said on
Here's a little tweak in the popular (and frankly overused) phrase. "KEEP CALM AND BE PATIENT"

Marital counselling works over time, and it requires dedicated and constant effort from both partners to work effectively and at its best. If you find that it doesn't work, it could be that either your partner or you or even both of you are not open about the counselling enough. If you are more receptive and apply the techniques and knowledges learned there with care, it could work.

Good luck!
slightlyydifferent said on
A single session of marriage counseling is not enough to feel its effect on your couple but is good enough to understand do you and your partner feel comfortable with the therapist. DAVIS54 gave you an useful list of topics to think about before proceeding. Be patient focused on your goal to heal your marriage.
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