Lolita said on
Wow. This is a double blow. Rebuilding relationships and trust after this is going to take time. Personally, I would divorce the man, but if you feel that he is truly repentant and wants to work it out, then by all means try. Otherwise walk away from him - to have an affair with your sister seems like more than just cheating; it seems cruel and vindictive. But you can't walk away from your sister. She must have known how this would hurt you, so what was she thinking? I would imagine that jealousy of you must play a large role. I would recommend that you see a therapist for help on how to forgive your sister and husband.
Vilkoma said on
Ok, it's going to be hard! I recommend a professional therapist as well. If you can let them both go and wish them well will be the best thing to do,and the hardest also. Don't ask yourself "why is this happening". It is going to be very difficult to trust anyone after the story, but not impossible. Move, change the surrounding, take time to heal and be strong!
newlywedgal said on
Complicated situations like these make people want to run away from everything, but that's not a good idea. Instead, take some time off from the drama and calm your emotions and thoughts. Go on a short holiday with supportive friends to put your mind in perspective on the situation. Prevent yourself from making rash decisions and actions you might regret in the future. Over time, you will know what to do in a way that will not put you in a disadvantage.
Mesmerizer said on
itshazyhere said on
Don't escalate things further, and have a confrontation immediately. After the fresh discovery of an affair, everyone might be in shock, shame and disbelief that they might just resort to hurtful tactics to protect themselves. As such, it might be best to take time off for yourself and get disconnected from the event and emotions so that you can view the issue with objectivity and detachment. It can be difficult, but it is possible.
SUMMERS said on
A husband having an extramarital affair is an extreme violation of trust, but engaging in sexual activities with his wife’s sister makes him a special kind of offender. He’s put not just your relationship with him, but your relationship with your sister, too, at risk. She has also severely violated your trust. Steps must be taken to protect yourself from more hurt. If they stay together, you must not continue to have a relationship with your sister, as it’s obvious she doesn’t give priority to your feelings and your sacred marital bond. While it may be hurtful, getting her out of your life may be the only way to keep him out, too.
FLEMING01 said on
This is a very difficult situation which must be extremely painful for you. Please get some help for yourself as you cannot go through this alone. Talk to a trustworthy friend or confidant, your pastor or a counselor. If your husband is willing to stop the affair and admit that he has done wrong, then perhaps your marriage can be restored over time through counseling. Your relationship with your sister will also depend on her reaction as to whether she asks your forgiveness or not. Most of all you need to take time for yourself to get perspective on this situation. Get help from reliable and faithful people who know you and can advise you what best to do. Be patient with yourself and don’t rush into a decision until you are sure what to do.