Many married couples believe they can solve all of their marital problems because of a reservoir of love and respect. While these laudable qualities are indispensable, that do not guarantee that the couple will be able to overcome hardships without outside help. Counselors provide insight. Insight is often defined as the ability to recognize the facets of an issue, problem, or opportunity. Because the counselor looks at your marriage from the outside, they are uniquely positioned to see issues and opportunities that you and your partner are not able to see.
There are some that would say that marriage and couples counseling is a waste of time, and for those who think that is the case, I agree, it would be a waste of time for them. In order to have success in any type of counseling, you must go in with an open mind. Is it for everybody? No. For those who do give it a fair shot, I believe that having someone else to bounce your ideas or feelings off of, makes a huge difference. They can open your eyes to the possibility that the way you perceived a situation may not be the way it was intended. It is very hard for the person who caused the issue to change your view once the damage has been done, but an outsider can lend a different perspective. Also, I think it’s hard sometimes to tell someone you care about something that they do that bothers you. Sometimes, it is just easier to say it to someone else.
Marriage and couples counseling are not only for people who are having marital issues. They can be used and preventative meausures before the arguments begin. If you are having issues in your relationship, counseling can help improve communication and alleviate you and your mate from whatever is troubling your relationship.
My husband and I never went to couples counseling or anything like that, but that probably has to do with the fact that it just wasn’t a popular thing to do in my day. You just used to have to deal with things and somehow make it work. I think it’s a great resource to have. Sometimes it helps to have someone to talk to who isn’t a family member or friend because you probably don’t have to be so careful about what you say around them.