Please help me!
This is my second marriage. I have a daughter from my first relationship and I married my wife 2 years ago. It's her second marriage as well; she has a son and a daughter from her first marriage. Our kids are all aged between 10-12 years. I had moved into her home after the marriage because she insisted I did with my daughter. My daughter has a few differences with her stepmum and feels that she does not understand her. Often even I feel that my wife is not giving her the attention she deserves; in fact, I feel her real kids also feel pretty much the same about this. She's never around, is very cold at times, and wants to make most of her decisions without even consulting me. We have had so many fights about this whenever I tried to raise this matter. It always ends in my abusing and losing my cool. She's too used to doing things her ways and does not really care how I feel . Lately, when the fight got too much, she said I can 'get out' of the house and out of the relationship if I had such a huge problem. I'm hurt and don't know what to do. The marriage is clearly not working out and I feel the environment is very harsh for my daughter. I would like to reconsider the marriage but I don't think she will be very positive about that. I'm confused and really dont know what to do. Please guide me!
Maybe you should not give it up yet. Give her a chance to remedy her ways by telling her how all this is badly affecting the kids. Open your heart to her and tell her that you really want for things to work out. Perhps she'll understand. In the meantime, speak to your daughter and assure her that things will improve, and that you will do everything in your power to improve the situation in the house. show the same level of affection towards her kids as well.... they probably need your support the most since mum is being ignorant. as for the hurt part, tell her that she hurt you with such comments and if she really meant it. You really need to give this a shot,,, if after having done all this, things are still at a standstill then you may consider ending it.