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Asked by Last Updated:

How do I handle a verbally abusive relationship?

How do I handle a verbally abusive relationship?

5 Answers

Jeremiah Answered:

Communication counseling in couples’ therapy may be the most effective method to work on a relationship that is emotionally abusive. Emotional abuse can last for years, and can long outlast the relationship itself by creating post-traumatic trauma. Often times, two partners may be emotionally abusive to one another, or one partner may bring out their worst in the other. If your partner is verbally abusive, tell him you do not appreciate what he says and let him know from the very beginning that you will not tolerate it. Correct him, and make a statement about yourself that’s positive. Do not throw verbal insults back or be argumentative. Stay calm and collected and acknowledge that he is upset but that you won’t respond until he is ready to talk in a positive way. Even if what he has to say isn’t positive, it is still possible to communicate without demeaning the other person. This is where you might suggest couples’ counseling. You will want to let your partner know that you cannot stay in a relationship where you are put down. If he does not respond well to the idea of counseling, it is a sign that he does not want to change, and you may need to consider if the relationship is really worth your dignity, self-esteem, and mental health.

GIBSON Answered:

Don't listen to what they are saying, but instead spend time with people who build you up, and who will help you tell your partner that they are being abusive.

MARSHALL Answered:

Don't accept what your partner is saying as fact. They are trying to hurt you, whether to gain power over you, because they are hurt, or because they enjoy it. Don't lash back out in kind, either.

Pacothetaco Answered:

While you cannot control someone else's behaviors, you can control how you respond in different situations. This may mean setting boundaries, but it may also mean leaving the situation.

Honeymoon Answered:

Make sure that you set boundaries. That´s the only way to respect yourself. Express your thoughts and feelings very clearly and tell your partner that you expect the same from him. Ask him about the true motivation of his behavior. If he doesn´t change, insist on a therapy or split up.

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