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How should I deal with emotional abuse in my marriage?

Answers (5)

honeymoon said on
Realize that somebody who abuses you doesn´t really love you and split up from that person. If you want to give it a chance set boundaries and insist on getting professional help.
pacothetaco said on
To overcome emotional abuse, it is important to encourage your spouse to join you in therapy. If he or she is not willing to join, it may be time to move on alone or seek out your own professional help to learn how to stand up for yourself.
MURRAY said on
Talk to a friend, a religious leader, or some other person that can give you support. They can help you address this issue.
COLE45 said on
Talk to your spouse. If your spouse refuses to work with you to try to fix the issue, then you may need to consider separation or divorce.
Charlotte said on
Emotional abuse(otherwise known as psychological abuse), can take many forms; but in general, it is abuse of one’s trust, their kindness, self esteem, psyche, and mental well being.  This type of abuse is very common, and it is carried out by behavior that seeks to tear someone down, making them feel badly about themselves time and time again.   An abuser may belittle, humiliate, question, or accuse their partner constantly.  They may use manipulation tactics, and strategies may be very obvious or they may be somewhat stealthy and difficult to spot; or a combination.  The person may have violent mood swings, and it may seem like their personality has changed. Emotional abusers and often hurt their partner’s self
confidence or esteem by insulting them or telling them that they aren’t good enough.  A person experiencing this type of abuse is likely to believe the bad things are true over time, and they blame themselves for their partner’s behavior.  They may have a sense they are “walking on eggshells” because they’ve become accustomed toepecting their partner’s cruel attacks. This situation leads to PTSD, anxiety, and depression.  It is mentally unhealthy to spend a lot of time around a hostile or unsettling situation with an explosive person.

It is not advised to simply deal with the abuse.   Rather, be active in trying to get therapy for the marriage by suggesting it in a non threatening way.  Unfortunately abusers generally have difficulty accepting or admitting to their problems, and telling them something is wrong with them may just cause an outburst. They may turn to the behavior as a method to turn the attention away from them and back onto you.  Changes are , the behavior works for them, so they usually do not have interest in changing it. They may honestly believe that they are right and that how they are treating you is okay.  If this sounds like your life,  andyour partner is unwilling to get professional help, you will need to make some serious decisions about whether to stay with them.  Emotional abuse is not  something you can deal with on your own, it almost always escalates into more severe forms of abuse, and can become something dangerous.
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