Having a happy married life is something that should be exercised with romance and understanding. Check with your partner how she/he understands romance. Is it a hot date, a hike, a long drive, making love or some quality time in the bed hugging? Jot down the answers and make sure all of them are fulfilled.
Marriage is two different individuals coming together and therefore there will be intolerant things found. FInd out what those things are and how much can be tolerated. Things like dishonesty in having affairs, hiding financial data, alcohol consumption and others. If these things are exhibited ,what are the consequences.
Couples should jot down the questions they would like to ask ahead of time, to be prepared for counseling sessions. Consider what is important to you, in your life, whether that is family, God, career, or any hobbies or passions you have. Consider anything you do in your life that could affect your partner. Make questions that relate to these; such as: How many children would you have? What if I wanted more children, or fewer? What if my family comes to stay for the holidays? Will you tolerate them? I travel frequently for my job. Will you be okay with me being absent for several days or weeks? Would you still be happy if I don’t come to church with you? What will we do if I lose my job? What if you lose yours? I want to own a home someday. How can we work together to negotiate our goals?
There are many thought-provoking questions that may be asked by your counselor to help you prepare for your future together. The questions range between a variety of topics, including sex, finances, interests, attitudes, family goals, career, and more. Some examples of the questions that may be asked are: What are your life’s goals? Do you plan to have children? When, and how many? What is your image of God? Are you religious? Do you feel you are emotionally healthy? What issues have you faced in past relationships? How long have you known your partner? What do you believe are the roles husbands and wives should play? What are your spending habits? How do we plan to support ourselves? Do we have debt? How will we handle conflict?
How much of our money will we donate/give away? What will our philosophy be about spending vs. saving? Money issues plague many marriages and cause a lot of conflict. It is imporatant that you have a plan for your finances before you take the next step together. There is always room for compromise and flexibility in the budget, but both partners must be on the same page.