Some say infidelity is akin to tearing flesh. The secrets, the lies, and the half-truths associated with infidelity do unimaginable damage to the marital bond. If the marriage is to be saved, full disclosure must be the first step. The unfaithful partner must be willing to cover all issues – partners, duration of the relationships, etc. – for the rebuilding to truly begin. Both partners must also share a willingness to engage in intense counseling so that the issues underlying the infidelity may be processed. In many ways, the couple must reinvent the relationship, recommitting themselves to a rediscovering of the joy and common ground that brought the two together in the first place.
Katherine, I feel so badly that you are going through this challenge in your marriage. I can tell you that I have been exactly where you are, and that actually led me to my purpose in life...I am a Relationship Consultant and as such, I help couples get past infidelity, death of a child, loss of job, extreme sickness, etc and create a marriage full of love, passion, trust, and intimacy! It truly can happen, and we can start working toward that immediately! It might happen rather quickly, and it might take a few months, but we can do it! I work with just one partner, or both, or each partner seperately. If you are interested in having an initial consultation, I would be happy to schedule that with you, as well! I truly am here to help people, and I would love to help you!!
Forgiveness always comes after honesty. An unfaithful partner must admit the infidelity in order for the other partner to forgive the indiscretion. Likewise, the “forgiving” partner should recognize that forgiveness and accountability are connected. Especially with a damaging issue like infidelity, the unfaithful partner must recommit himself/herself to the existing marital bond if the marriage is to heal and grow. Forgiveness without reciprocal commitments from the forgiven, is an empty act.