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Asked by Last Updated:

Did my wife cheat?

I feel so stupid.
20 years ago my wife came home from her OBGYN with antibiotics and told me we both had to take them and that I had to wwear a condom from then on even though she was on the pill.
I didn't bat an eye.
I thought that was weird but I did it without a question.
Now it is twenty years later we have three kids even though we have had sex an average of maybe four times a year in the last 19.
5 years and I feel like I'm just waking u.
I'm an idiot.
Many things have happened over the years that I did question only to have her get very angry or treat me like Im being a jerk.
Then not even answer.
as I write this I feel even stupider.
I am 51 years old now and I have been faithful since I met her.
I was with a lot of women before she and I got together but turned down every opportunity to be with another woman ater she and I staryed dating.
what do you think.
Am I an idiot?

5 Answers

Bursar Answered:

It's clear — she could only have picked up the STD from sex with another man. Sorry, but she cheated on you. Of course, this raises all sorts of unpleasant questions for you.

Murphy21 Answered:

Thank you. I think I'm just going through a rough patch in my relationship and I am hoping at some level it's true so I can leave and not feel guilty. I can't go anywhere. We have three children and a total of 25 years behind us. I need to make peace with all this. Thank you for all your help.

Admin Answered:

If it gives you the peace you need, then go confront her about these things, get a medical check up to find if your first-child is really your own. but be sure that it will complicate relationships, especially if you have been proved wrong, but if at this stage of your relationship you need this assurance, then do whatever you feel is right.

Murphy21 Answered:

I run the different scenarios though my head every so often. I'm 51 now and realize that I may have been ignoring this the whole time because I didn't want it to be true. I can't think of any other answer though. Our sex life abruptly slowed the can average of 3 time a year over the last 19 years. That includes when we were trying to conceive. We had trouble with the first one. It took five years of trying. I just want to know for sure if I've wasted my life being faithful to someone who hasn't been faithful to me. I even wonder if my first child is really mine. I just need to know the truth without a doubt si I can put this all behind me.

N_marriage Answered:

Why do you have such thoughts now? What has happened to raise this doubt ? did you catch her with someone ...something should have triggered this - if not, then this is just your imagination maybe. Share more details so readers can understand the situation better and offer answers accordingly...

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