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Asked by Last Updated:

Is there any hope for my marriage or is it over?

My husband and I have been married 10 years next month 31st.
Let me start by saying he is a good man and I know he loves me.
He has a porn addiction.
It used to bother me made me feel like I wasn't good enough.
After awhile I came to understand it has nothing to do with me.
Now he pays more attention to porn, Facebook, and even tv more than he does me.
I've told him how I feel about everything and that I shouldn't be a married woman and feel this lonlely.
After an argument 6 months ago I moved to our guest room and he doesn't even care.
I'm starting to think maybe my marriage is over but I still love him as much if not more than the day we got married.
I've told him I don't need 100% of his attention.
I would be happy with even a little bit.
He used to be romantic.
The one thing I miss most is things like I'd be in kitchen dishes or cooking he'd come up behind me wrap his arms around me and it was the best made me feel so good.
Now only time I get attention is if he wants sex.
I have cried, cussed, and told him what I need from him.
I am afraid this is leading to a divorce in our future.
Any advice appreciated.
Now I'm not perfect I asked him to take some time and let me know what he needs from me a few days later I asked him he said he couldn't think of anything

1 Answers

Henery Brown Answered:

There is no doubt in my mind that your husband spending more time with porn and social media is killing your relationship!
There's an article that speaks about the marital trauma of sex addiction with some of the things you mentioned (you can read it here: https://www.marriage.com/advice/physical-intimacy/marital-trauma-of-sex-addiction/)
I would highly suggest taking an online marriage course to get some of your issues straightened out. The Save My Marriage course helps couples get to the root of the problems in their relationship, encourages communication, helps rebuild trust, and builds a lot of other positive qualities that I think could be really beneficial to your marriage right now. You can find the course here: https://www.marriage.com/marriage-courses/save-my-marriage-course
Beyond that, I think your husband should go to counseling for his pornography/sex obsession. It is dehumanizing his relationship with you and causing him to disrespect you. This is incredibly unacceptable in a healthy marriage.

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