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I need an honest answer

Hello there,

First-time poster here, and I hope I can get some advice. I have been married for almost 13 years. My partner is truly my best friend, but the spark is gone. We have had a very difficult last few years, and this past year has been a nightmare.

He lost his job about 10 months ago and is still not employed. This has put a huge strain on our relationship, and I feel like it is the last straw for me. Do I love him, yes! Am I in love with him, I am not sure anymore. He is my best friend and I care about him and his well-being but is that enough to stay married? I left a few weeks ago and stayed with my parents for a few days. It was very difficult and we talked on the phone every day. Finally, I could not wait to come home, and the second I walked back in the door, I wanted to leave.

He knows that things have not been great between the two of us for quite some time now, but will never bring it up. I finally got him to go speak to a therapist, so I feel like he is taking the steps that I am asking him to take, but is doing nothing for himself. I love him with my whole heart, but I feel like we no longer have anything in common and I need to look after him like a child.
 
Here is the difficult part, I mean this without coming off as self-absorbed, but he worships me and he was an absolute mess when I left. I don't know what to do, what to say and when to say it. The last thing I want to do is crush/ ruin someone's life. Especially someone that I have had such a long history with. I just feel like I want to move in different directions, and he is just happy with the same old things we have been doing since the day we met. My biggest fear is what is he going to do without me? If I left for good, I know he would be broken, but that is not fair to me. Anyone that is thinking about separation and advice would be greatly appreciated.

1 Answer

SuperDev said on
If you want to save your marriage then There is Amazing book on it https://bit.ly/2LDsP4G
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