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Asked by Last Updated:

Is it normal for a wife to require a lot of personal time?

Is it normal for a wife to require a lot of personal time? My wife takes dance lessons 7 times a week for 2-3 hours each time, which means I do everything around the house: cook, clean, organize, buy groceries, etc.
I understand that she needs some personal time, but 20+ hours per week while doing very little around the house seems a bit excessive.
Also, because my work is much more demanding than hers, this means that as soon as our toddler goes to sleep, and I finish doing things around the house, I typically need to go back to work on my laptop, so I barely ever get any personal time for myself.
A good example would be today - she was here in the morning until lunchtime (I cooked) and she has been pretty much gone all day except for 2 hours in the afternoon.
During these two hours, I went grocery shopping and when I came back, she was on her way out.
It's 10 pm and she just came back.
She is now going to take a shower and go on her iPad, because, naturally she is too tired to do anything since she has been out all day.
Whenever I bring it up, she gets very defensive and it’s very difficult to have a productive conversation.
Also, if she doesn't go out, she is in a horrible mood, which isn’t great either.
Thoughts? Is this normal?

1 Answers

Yellow5 Answered:

This is a shitty situation and a living nightmare. I am living this same selfish nightmare. Have you voiced your concerns? Clearly she is aware of how selfish she is- but maybe she needs to officially hear it

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