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Asked by Last Updated:

Can I keep this away from my future wife?

I am not married.
let me start by saying that.
  I want to know how many of you married men keep things a secret from your wife from your younger days to this day.
  I am the type of person who feels that everything will come to light with the right person eventually.
Unfortunately, I don't want that to happen because its a lie ive learned to live with because I've been lying about it for years.
What I am about to say is the first time I've ever admitted the complete truth.
  In my 6 years of sexual activity.
I have only had sex with 3 women.
I lost my virginity when I was 17 to my moms friend who was in her late 40s.
My mom knows about it and its never really been a big deal to anyone.
We stopped having sex about a year later when she got remarried.
I then went a year and a half without sex.
I then had sex with this girl who was into me who i met through mutual friends at parties.
We only lasted a few months.
I then went 2 years without sex and recently had it with this girl who Ive been dating.
She's my 3rd "body" while i am in double digits for her.
The paragraph above is the complete truth.
However, in my persoanl life with friends, I tell people I've had sex with 10 girls.
I came to that number not randomly but by counting the times I've been close to getting laid and not closed (picked up a drunk girl at a club and she then changes her mind or passes out, times I've gone on vacation and made up girls I "met at the resort".
I lie about this based on just pure embarassment.
My older brother has a body count in the 40s.
My two best guy friends are in the high teens and twenties.
I just don't want to seem like a complete loser.
  I also lie about baggage that I have that others don't know about.
I had a fling with a cousin who lives in another country that I didn't properly meet until I was 20.
We never had sex but made out on several occassions, drunk and sober.
Another secret I keep is that one time I got head from this morbidly obese girl whose pretty cousin all my friends are friends with.
I just want to know if I will ever have to be completely honest with someone and tell them all these things.

1 Answers

Thegorgeousmisery Answered:

No not necessarily , you do not have to tell anyone. I will say, you really shouldn't be embarrassed about how many people you have slept with, it isn't a life goal is it? ( to have meaningless sex with LOADS of women/people) If it is then do what you wish. But the fact you have had sex a few times with 3 people or so really does not change your personality or say anything about you as an individual in general. It is ok, I have also only had sex with 3 people. I am a woman & the 3rd guy is now my husband. The fact you don't take advantage of drunk girls is admirable. You don't sound like a dirty pervert who brags about sexual interactions so keep it that way, maybe seek a new crowd of friends. It really is not the most important thing in life ( sex & how many people you have done it with) Keep being yourself and maybe try not to lie about your interactions with women and be proud of yourself for being a decent person.

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