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We divorced 6 months ago and now my life is miserable.


We got married 2 years ago after living in for 5 years. I have 2 kids from our relationship. I thought after divorce it would be great to live with my kids alone rather than bearing my husband’s violence.
We intend to raise our kids by co-parenting and are in the process of getting the legal approval for that. But now to think about myself and my future alone, I feel scared. I don’t know how my life will go on without him and how it is going to affect my children. Please suggest something I can do deal with the situation and also bring other latent drawbacks of divorce in my knowledge so that I can prepare myself early to deal with it in the future.

Answers (10)

Sofia daniel said on
Hey,
Things must have been bizarre in your marriage that you eventually had to dissolve it. Since you have kids to take care of now, I suggest you to prepare yourself to deal with the repercussions of divorce to build a better future for your kids and yourself.

1. Try to spend as much time as possible with your kids. Keep them close to you so that they won’t feel the absence of father-love.

2. Be very cautious about their future from today only. Keep a check on what interests your child the most. Support them emotionally, physically and financially as well. Look for more ways to grow your saving to invest in kid’s future.

3. It’s very important for you to be healthy physically and emotionally to keep the environment positive around you. This positivity will help you develop a good camaraderie with your kids.
Here are some of the common drawbacks of divorce:

Emotional pain: It is inevitable. But be aware, the more quickly you recover from the pain, the better you can concentrate on your future. Do not let the bitter memories of divorce affect you. Make sure you invest your free time in something productive.
Difficulty in raising child: Raising kids could be difficult in the future if things are not planned early in life. As stated above keep a mental note of what future your kids see for themselves and start investing a little bit in it from the very beginning. This will help you develop a habit in the long run and will certainly prove to be a profitable exercise. Also, seek the financial help from their father as well whenever needed.

Insecurity: Kids can get insecure too. Kids at such a tender age do not understand the meaning of divorce and when they do, it’s a life-changing event for them. They come up with infinite questions about your failed relationship and it’s very important to keep a clear picture of it in front of them.
Also, if at any age you find they need a counseling for better clarity about divorce and to learn how survival is still possible without the support of their father, then do the needful.  

Aakifa said on Jan 1

You have written so well. Great sharing.
GregSmith said on
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marsh4ll.john said on
Hi! Try to realize what the issue was in particular. Or try talking to your ex after a breakup. Start the discussion softly and rationally. It would be best if she told you what irritated her or what actions of yours were unacceptable to her. I can give you one advice. There is a good blog about relationships: https://ok-dating.net/ It is written by a group of enthusiasts and the write really useful things.
Xena69 said on
I just brought to my husbands attention of his infideliry on his cell. Well he turned the tables onme. Saying its all in my head. He denide everything I asked him. From the beginning it was Porn. He said he would stop. What a Joke? I know he uses his cellphone  in the bedroom. He denided that too. He said I dont know where my flap phone is? I knew this was going to happen if I asked him. He does that all the time. I should no better. He is a compulser liar. I am at wits end with him. I lost my love for him because he just keeps doing it. I can not afford a lawyer but was thinking of buying a nanny cam and put it in the bedroom. So I can prove it. Idont want to sleep with him any more. He is scum. He has no respect for me. That is my bed. He should sleep on the couch. He is the one who chose to do this to me. I think a divorce will give me some peace in my life. I have a chronic condition which he held that against me. . I am stuck in this toxix relationship. Xena 69 any help please reply
cybersniffer16 said on
Hey, 
I am feeling sad for you. 
Did you try taking services from any private marriage counselor. I too was in a same situation but luckily i have tried a marriage counselor (https://www.marriagecounselingalt.com/) and it helped us alot. 
We are now happily married for last 7 years. 
umairaslam said on
Setback that it is, divorce offers people a valuable opportunity to reflect on and learn from the mistakes they have made so as to minimize the chances that they will make those same mistakes again. The divorce rate for second marriages is higher than that for first marriages. Many experts believe this is because a majority of divorcees leap into hasty ill-conceived second marriages out of loneliness rather than carefully planning them for success. It is wise to do one's homework before getting involved again to maximize one's chances of success.
Source
 
Laurel12 said on
Sweetness of marriage is having your spouse be the same man you married ,while courtship and after marriage.we have been married for 7, but it got more interesting when he comes back home very late than usual.i decided to speak with him in order to know what has been wrong with him or where i have gone wrong.several persuasion proved abortive, this had me down at work and home.From that point i knew something was wrong,all attempt to know who he was seeing outside wasn’t successful, this got me sick and i decided to go for a divorce but my attorney needed some sought of evidence, so my friend suggested this dude THOMASHACKER15 AT GMAIL to help me hack my husbands phone. I discovered William has been cheating on me for years ! To top that he has 3 children I don’t know of.  I sent him away from my house but the children keep asking about their father. I really don’t know what to do
lorenzo7 said on
Hey tarajadon.here,
Do you want to save your marriage.? Ok.

Healing your marriage is about deciding what changes your relationship needs in order to be stronger, healthier and happier, and then making those changes happen. It is about taking charge and not letting the winds of fate control your lives. “Yes,” you say. “Where do I begin? What do I work on? How am I going to save my marriage?”

I know you are looking for the magic words that will solve everything, but there is no quick-fix. Well, your answers begin here. Click the link below.

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This is a process. Others have gone through the same thing you’re going through, and they came out of it with better, happier marriages. You will, too.
Again, if you want to safeguard your marriage,
This link is your solution: http://bit.ly/2YRucQY
Let’s help each other and save our marriage.

tarajadon,
stefanjames said on
Why is that always happening to some of our fellow women? I think they didnt do some sort of right thing to make their man madly inlove to them. And when that scenario happens,thats where the CHEATING,COLD TRAFFIC or a lot of ARGUMENTS starts to happen because LOVE also starts to fade away. Majority of the women think that everything in a relationship is FINE until one day that they will be surprise that their man will not love them anymore. MOST men keep the secret on what they REALLY want for a partner.In the end it will become a cold traffic in a relationship when the girl didnt pass what a man really looking for .Worst is ,its end up in hurtful breakup or divorce. Theres a less tendency that he comeback UNLESS you CHANGE YOURSELF ,on whats wrong on it. But like what I said some women didnt know what is wrong.They didnt know how to solve problem on a relationship because they didnt even know what it is...ON WHAT IS THE REAL PROBLEM... If you experiencing CHEATING,COLD TRAFFIC from your man,not treated you the same way,NOT CLINGY anymore then I strongly recommend to you to get to know more the review about **His Secret Obsession** here : https://bit.ly/2Sg3CyQ .This is because, the training & techniques you will get on that thing from a relationship expert is priceless. Because LOVE is priceless when you love back by the one you really love. Its the BEST part on our life,all the goodies of our living is in there . Having a partner in the up and down rollercoaster life that is always on your side ,willing to help you to solve PROBLEMS (Like in math problems,its more fun if we have a cheatmate to solve the problem) , a partner in SEX and especially building and giving you the best FAMILY that majority of us dream of...For me, to live our life with a partner that is FAITHFUL is the key to complete and fulfill the saying “Living Our Life to the FULLEST.
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