We divorced 6 months ago and now my life is miserable.
We got married 2 years ago after living in for 5 years.
I have 2 kids from our relationship.
I thought after divorce it would be great to live with my kids alone rather than bearing my husband’s violence.
We intend to raise our kids by co-parenting and are in the process of getting the legal approval for that.
But now to think about myself and my future alone, I feel scared.
I don’t know how my life will go on without him and how it is going to affect my children.
Please suggest something I can do deal with the situation and also bring other latent drawbacks of divorce in my knowledge so that I can prepare myself early to deal with it in the future.
Things must have been bizarre in your marriage that you eventually had to dissolve it. Since you have kids to take care of now, I suggest you to prepare yourself to deal with the repercussions of divorce to build a better future for your kids and yourself.
1. Try to spend as much time as possible with your kids. Keep them close to you so that they won’t feel the absence of father-love.
2. Be very cautious about their future from today only. Keep a check on what interests your child the most. Support them emotionally, physically and financially as well. Look for more ways to grow your saving to invest in kid’s future.
3. It’s very important for you to be healthy physically and emotionally to keep the environment positive around you. This positivity will help you develop a good camaraderie with your kids.
Here are some of the common drawbacks of divorce:
Emotional pain: It is inevitable. But be aware, the more quickly you recover from the pain, the better you can concentrate on your future. Do not let the bitter memories of divorce affect you. Make sure you invest your free time in something productive.
Difficulty in raising child: Raising kids could be difficult in the future if things are not planned early in life. As stated above keep a mental note of what future your kids see for themselves and start investing a little bit in it from the very beginning. This will help you develop a habit in the long run and will certainly prove to be a profitable exercise. Also, seek the financial help from their father as well whenever needed.
Insecurity: Kids can get insecure too. Kids at such a tender age do not understand the meaning of divorce and when they do, it’s a life-changing event for them. They come up with infinite questions about your failed relationship and it’s very important to keep a clear picture of it in front of them.
Also, if at any age you find they need a counseling for better clarity about divorce and to learn how survival is still possible without the support of their father, then do the needful.