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Asked by Last Updated:

For the ladies - where has the lust gone?

There are obviously many factors at play, but married ladies, can you perhaps explain why you would lose lust for your husband? My wife is 34yrs old, we have 2 lovely kids (5&2), both healthy, in shape and up to a year ago, sex was amazing.
She confesses to being deeply in love with me and constantly says I'm perfect, but just cannot get herself to have any sexual desire for me anymore.
We have had sex twice in the last 80 days.
We've tried a few things (on / off) couples therapy, therapy on her own, reading a few books and the next step is for her to perhaps see if her hormones are all funny.
What else could be going on? I'm 1m% sure she isn't cheating.
Where to from here?

1 Answers

bunnyhabit Answered:

Sound like a medical problem like hormonal imbalance if she can not pin point the cause, On the average married couples have sex 1.5 times a week (some higher and some lower obviously). Unmarried is higher at an average of 3 times a week. Twice in eighty days is of course unacceptable. I would suggest a complete gynecological and psychological exam for your wife to establish the root cause. Of course the possibility she is misinforming you is possible and she abstains for another reason that she doesn't want to admit to you. This should flesh out at psychological exam. Do you have a static sexual ritual, time of day and position? Try experimenting with different sequencing, activities and positions. Spice up with a little kink like role play or bsdm. 

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