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Asked by Last Updated:

Intimacy Problems

Hello.
My name is Justin and I have been married to my wife for almost 10 months and we have never had sex.
I have done things for her and occasionally she has done things for me but we have never been full on intimate.
Our marriage is wonderful in every other aspect and we hardly ever fight.
We really want children but this lack of intimacy is really getting in the way.
I have tried talking to her about it but she gets really shy and embarrassed about the subject.
I am very small and am not sure if that has anything to do with it.
We have tried twice and we just couldn't get it to work and she got too scared and we just haven't done it since.
I really love her and don't want to push her or make her feel uncomfortable.
I just don't know how to handle the situation.
I have tried communicating to her, suggesting a counselor, and not bringing it up, but it is taking away from the ability to have children.
The lack of intimacy is also a burden for me.
Any help would be great! Thanks!

2 Answers

Jamie76 Answered:

If you guys can't agree on this you probably need some counseling. Mismatched libidos is common and not that big a deal. No sex for your first 10 months is a huge problem. She may have some trauma from life experiences that is causing her to avoid sex. If it's shyness - get over it. If you're "too small" - bull crap. You guys need to discuss this, sex is part of marriage. There are so many people who would love to have what you have - don't waste it.

AmolJ Answered:

Spicing things up in the bedroom and making your partner uncomfortable are two absolutely different things. Physical intimacy in the bedroom is a two-way street! You get what you give. You can ask him why you want to roleplay this situation. People like have all kind of new ways and find new ways for physical intimacy spicing up in the bedroom. Depend on you if your comfortable and if you do not tell them. Because Physical intimacy in the bedroom is a two-way and both should enjoy it.

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