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Asked by Last Updated:

Help! Was my husband crossing a line?

I am very hurt and upset right now and don’t know where to turn.
My husband of 15 years seems to have developed a work crush.
He says they were just friends but I think he was crushing on her.
A bunch of people from his work were going out to have a few drinks and she gave him her number so they could all meet up.
They ended up texting back and and forth quite a bit after that night! For about 2 weeks.
He didn’t come out and tell me he had a new friend and was texting her.
However, one day I asked who he was talking to and he told me his new friend.
Once I asked him to stop texting her he did.
What upsets me is that he didn’t tell me right away and it is unusual for him to have female friends.
He swears they were just friends but I think he may have liked her a bit.
He never went anyplace with her as he always came straight home after work.
Is this bad? He did stop texting her and he didn’t hide it from me but I am hurt.
Did he do something really wrong in texting her for weeks or did he do the right thing by acknowledging it was wrong, coming clean and ending the friendship? Is it normal for people to get crushed while married? He has not messaged her since an dit has been months.
Just so sad.
Is this normal or was my husband sliding down a slippery slope? Any advice would be appreciated! Thankyou!

1 Answers

CindyBaker Answered:

It is normal for a marriage to hit a plateau and sometimes just to shake things up people seek companionship, but things can go into a downward spiral when one thing leads to another and an innocuous friendship at work turns into an illicit relationship. It is perfectly normal for you to have intervened, asking your husband to stop all interaction with his female co-worker, beyond the capacity of work. However, you need to take more crucial corrective steps to ensure you both have a lasting marriage and a blissful companionship. Seek marital counseling to explore any possible reasons that are contributing to your marriage turning staid, and work at rekindling the spark in your relationship.

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