Should you go to your parents’ house or make your own tradition?
As a newly married couple you will have many “firsts” and many decisions to make, not the least of which will be where to spend your first Thanksgiving. This is something you may have even discussed during your engagement and marriage preparation. You decision will be influenced by your own personal circumstances such as the geographical location of your respective parents, as well as the quality of your relationship with your parents. For some couples, this will be an easy decision, but others may need to think through their options.
Here are a few helpful questions for you to answer:
What are your priorities?
Each of you needs to be honest about what is really important to you. Perhaps your family doesn’t make much fuss at Thanksgiving while your spouse’s family goes all out with the traditional fare. Perhaps you would really just prefer to be alone as a couple and set a foundation for your marriage and your own future family traditions. Once you are clear about your own personal priorities, you are ready for the next question.
How do your parents feel?
Perhaps both your sets of parents have already started expressing their desires for you to be with them on this special day. Or perhaps there is no pressure at all and they are leaving the choices up to you. Either way, chat to your parents and find out how they feel and what their expectations are.
What are the logistics involved?
This question is to do with how far away you live from your families. If you are in the same city, it makes things a lot simpler, but many couples find themselves living far away from their parents and travel costs would need to be taken into consideration as well as the time that it would take to travel back and forth.
What options are open to you?
Once you have thought these things through, you would be able to identify a few possible options for your particular situation. These may include alternating between your families, visiting with one this year and the other next year. If they live close by, you could spend part of the day with one family and part with the other. Or you may consider hosting both families at your home.
What is your decision?
Once you have laid out all your options, you will need to make a decision which is agreeable to both of you. Whatever you decide, remember that now you are a married couple and your relationship with your spouse comes first.
Here are some more tips to consider while celebrating your first Thanksgiving as a married couple:
- Remember to make decisions together as a couple and a family
- Spend the day joyously and appreciate each other
- Encourage everyone to share something they are thankful for.
- Express your gratitude and share how blessed you feel in your marriage.
- Tell a story from your past Thanksgiving celebrations to each other.
- Watch your favorite movie together, play games or read about the history of Thanksgiving.